1. Saturday, April 5, 2014

    bukowski couldnta done it because he liked to drink too much 

    funny

    same with hem, hunter, slash, all of em.

    but id rather zip all around santa monica and venice on a friday night.

    first because an aussie music exec was done with lacma and needed to get back to the crib

    and then it was all wessside all night for a while. got this nice couple who talked real estate.

    a family who lived a few blocks away from where i first lived when i moved out here.

    this sweet pair on a date from the westwood wilshire condos to sushi in brentwood

    randys donuts

    picked up a trio of frenchies who discovered in west LA the keys the sushi pair had left behind.

    and of course the french wanted to go to rose all the way in venice.

    they were nice enough but the whole time i was thinking, ive gotta get back to that sushi restaurant

    before bro realizes his blunder and starts panicking and maybe leaving the restaurants.

    when i dropped off the french i said “bon nuit” and lol they were un petit shocked.

    sped back to the soosh joint and they couple were just getting their albacore sashimi

    startled to see me, and i said, are these yours? the dude was all omg yes thank you thank you!

    those moments make me nervous so i said no problem and left the restaurant quickly

    like a thief in the night.

    who just returned your mercedes keys.

    but when i got to my car, parked in the red zone because xbi plates, there was bro

    “tony thank you so much, those were my house keys, and my car MY LIFE! what can i give you?”

    the correct answer is “one a those albacores”  but i said, “its fine, i should have checked before i left”

    he dug through his wallet and gave me $5 and i said oh thats plenty thank you.

    and his gratefulness was just beautiful. priceless.

    also, $5 is actually great. thank you.

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    earlier in the night i rejected a group of 5 because you can get a ticket, it’s unsafe, it doesn’t help the system, etc etc

    but sometimes you feel really happy because of what just happened a block away at the sushi spot so

    when two cute girls say omg we have 5 is that ok?

    i say only if beard-o rides bitch.

    later i took a comedy writer from hollywood to his sweet pad in sherman oaks

    he was talking to his buddy in the back seat, mostly about how amazed they are with their childrens development

    specifically about how one of the boys on the tball team called another lad “hairy balls”

    one of the moms said did you call him hairy balls?

    he said, no i said he has hairy balls.

    they are five.

    live nude girls

    comedy guy tells me to take his buddy to santa monica on his tab and we chat while driving over the 405

    which is a convention of construction materials and trucks and cones

    drop off bro, who tips me sixty bucks because hes amazing

    next ride, five minutes later: venice to chatsworth at 2:30am.

    three quiet sleepy and a little bit stinky seventeen year olds

    what kinda music do the kids listen to at your school, i asked on the half hour drive of mostly silence

    well, if it’s original, the sole boy said, we wont listen to it.

    the two girls in the back chuckled.

    they said their parents are driving them to coachella, where they have a hotel.

    will your parents be at the show?

    um, no. they’re going to just shop i think, and stay at the hotel, one of the girls said.

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