sometimes you get the bull, sometimes you get the horns

hospitaland sometimes your mom has to come to the xbi hospital hidden beneath the abandoned Dominick’s

and shes not happy.

“i thought you quit the xbi. i thought these were all lies on your blog. this is not right. THIS IS NOT RIGHT!”

and sometimes the nurse has to assure her that everythings gonna be ok, that her son was needed, which is why he flew out to chicago when he did, why he missed the sunset strip music festival

starring one of his favorite bands in the world, janes addiction.

because there was work to do in chicago. sorta dangerous work. but work he was super great at.

HE IS TOO OLD FOR THIS! THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE COMPLETED IN HIS 20s! she yells

and the heartbroken nurses try not to cry while the doctors nervously smile.

he’s an amazing agent, your son, the polish man in the white coat assures her. he chuckles like the black doctor in the simpsons. he tells her, “somehow he always knows what’s going to happen next.”

“and whats going to happen next, mom, is we’re going to go to red lobster,” i told her as i woke up

pulled the cords off my hairy chest

and retrieved my bloody hawaiian shirt.

some jackhole gave me a white sox jersey

probably to see if i had all my senses about me

and i whipped it back at him

and they gave me a plain blue tshirt in exchange for my bloody rags

and my mom drove me quietly to the red lobster on army trail road and we ate and drank water and she steamed trying to hold back her anger

she gritted her teeth and said, your niece and nephew dont want to go to your funeral.

i said, momma, even deaths not invited to that bash.