death rides a skateboard

death rides a skateboard

xbi was all hey it’s your birthday tomorrow, what do you want?

how about for you to leave me alone?

LOL they said no really, a cake? an ice cream cake? a pie?

i was all not seriously, for realsie, how about a year of radio silence, maybe three?

they were like dude youre the best we ever trained we cant just let you flounder out in the world sitting on your assets like some hobo.

i said whats a year between friends.

we’re here to save lives and make the world a better place, they said.

then we both LOLed.

how about a skateboard, i whispered.

you’ll break yr neck, they replied.

i’ll wear a helmet.

no you won’t.

ok how about the iphone six plus.

all sold out, how about the plain old six.

got that already.

what do you need the plus for then?

fine, i’ll take a pie.