Dear Tony, Whats with all the Uber writing and never any about AMPAS? Signed, Mike

in a basket

dear mike,

in 2004 or thereabouts i wrote a little thing called How To Blog.

it got turned into a book, a mini series, a 3D film they show at Universal Studios, and in Guam it’s a religion.

one of the first rules of blogging, i wrote, was never to blog about work.

blogging’s great, it will get you laid, many riches, and better tables at taquerias, but it can also get you fired.

id love to write about all of the jobs ive had over the years but Uber is really the only one i feel comfortable writing about because they pretend they’re not my employer and i pretend they dont have the power to can me,

plus even when i write about my passengers, i just gloss over the bulletpoints.

for example, got this high school girl who was very sweet but admitted she hated reading and was grateful that at her school the teachers read the books aloud to the kids. i was all what? and this is private school!

she said they also were given laptops and the teachers say its ok to write notes in the computer of the lectures


your mother and i pay too much tuition for you to be doing that sweetheart!

she told me that she hates reading but loves sports but cant play any sports because her grades are so bad.

all of this from such an angelic face.

meanwhile shes taking an uber from one side of town to the other as it’s surging!

she said the grade school she was in was so small that instead of school busses the school would reimburse the kids if they took taxis.

my mind was blowing all over the inside of my car. it was a mess to clean up.

so thats why mike