sometimes i think things and i think god are you dumb

sidney poitier tony curtis jack lemmoni think you know that path is stupid. you know nothing, jon snow, can be made of that.

but i obsess.

i have two cats. when they hear my bedroom door open they go crazy and they tear around the corner and they run in my room and they go over to the book case and look at the books.

i say to them, what are you gonna read? what is your deal.

it’s more about being in a place they know theyre not really welcome, than actually being somewhere they can rock.

they have the whole mansion, the only room off limits (every now and then) is my room.

but omg they love being in there.

once they get comfortable they do the unimaginable: they chase after shadows and phantoms that they “see” in my sheets.

they pounce on things that dont exist.

sometimes my foot is under what doesnt exist and i fling them off the bed. so that they’ll learn.

but they dont learn and neither do i.

i too search in the shadows for mythical treasures.

everything that i want is right in front of me and wearing signs that say Good or Bad but thats not good enough.

i live in a giant city where things are clearly marked and yet i hunt. mostly online. but sometimes in dreams.

where is it. where is she. where am i. who am i. how can i do this. what can i do here.


and nothing.

until the Good Lord flings me off of this giant waterbed called Hollywood.

and back into yr heart.