why im voting for donald trump for anything that he’s running for

jerry lewisall i want is people to be frank and honest with me. especially if theyre working for me.

politicians work for us. we keep forgetting.

the only two i can see who arent lying to us are trump and bernie.

maybe rand paul but he seems like he’s so pissed off at the world.


if someone has a giant stick up their butt i dont trust them, theyre hiding something, about their stick.

in their butt.

sticks dont belong there.

so theres trump and theres bernie. i like bernie better as a person but he’s keeping it a little too real. like when girls refuse to wear deodorant or when dogs lick their privates and then want to lick my face.

what i want, what i need is a bernie vs trump debate. if i was a tv network thats what id do. who cares. you want equal time? fine, i’ll give you equal time. but first i want bernie and trump to battle.

i thought this was the land of the free. i thought guns were legal. i thought i didnt have to wear a seat belt. i do have to wear a seat belt? ATTICA! ATTICA!

they served cake today at work for the august bday people. it was ice cream cake. it was incredible.

a long time ago benjamin franklin said, i want to invent ice cream cake.

but someone washing their wig yelled out the window, shut up ben franklin either you get ice cream next to the cake or ice cream on top of the cake but YOU CANNOT have ice cream actually inside the cake or else youre a witch. lets see if you can float in the Lake of the Witches! omg omg.

so ben franklin got on his horse and raced to france because america was a wee bit cray.

then some witch said theyre gonna burn me anyways so she made ice cream cake and everyone was happy so they let trump debate bernie and thats how the west was won.