yesterday was the president of the usa’s bday, he’s 24


we probably shouldnt see race in things, i should probably eat better, i should probably go to the gym

i should probably buy better clothes.

and i should probably say how happy i am about soul brother number one.

it is nice to have someone in the white house who

isnt completely full of shit

isnt a total fucking knob

and even if hes spying on us all, every one of us, all the time

and lying about it

at least he’s probably looking for actual terrible people

and cruising right over the typical embarrassing stuff

like how bad i am at fantasy baseball.

things i wish he would do more of:

television speeches

beer summits

interviews with howard stern.

you promised us change.

anyway, happy birthday!