1. Thursday, December 17, 2015

    picked up the cutest lil blonde girl 

    jerseyshe said she wanted me to take her to this tanning salon up the way.

    she works there.

    i told her i know nothing about tanning salons. i asked her to please tell me everything there is to know.

    she said you can get spray tans starting at $30, but most really good ones can cost $70 which is why many people do an all-you-can tan membership of $100 a month.

    she told me that the thing that surprised her the most was how many normal looking DUDEs regularly get a tan. not body builders, not male models, not Vinny and the Situation, but just normal bros.

    speaking of the Situation, she said that on Halloween lots of people come in to get orange tans so they can rock the Jersey Shore Halloween costume.

    but heres the thing i wanted to tell her. she was beautiful. naturally beautiful. her skin was not tanned and that was perfectly ok. better than ok. she was exactly who youd think of if you thought California Girl.

    i wanted to tell her, what are you doing? you dont need to change one thing. you cannot improve. you have what all these other girls are trying to get and so many dudes want in their gf. but i didnt say nothing because who knows why she does it. and it’s none of my beeswax.

    so i told her shed see me in there soon. and she LOLed.