i never learned to rap
or sing in a way that makes the young girls cry.
but i have learned how to deal with uber passengers who cancel.
yesterday i was doing so well. first ride went from here to there.
next ride went there to here.
and then i cruised up wilshire from the beach past OJ’s to Bundy when ping!
it was an Uber Select ride, my favorite so i did a U-turn and waited and she canceled.
i was a little mad because there i was, clean car, vacuumed rugs, Sinatra on the stereo.
so i looked to see if i was there long enough to get the $5 cancelation fee.
but when i checked i saw that she was gonna be going to Atwater Village. which is a great ride for me.
so i looped around again because maybe she needed to take a quick leak or smoke a bowl or take out the trash
and in 5-10 minutes she would make my day.
well, friends, she came out of that door 1 minute later and said are you my uber?
i said sure am.
she said can you cancel this guy then?
i said no but you can if you want.
and she did and she hired me and we drove and $60 later i was 10 minutes from my home and i laughed and laughed and laughed
but i still regret not learning how to spin on my head.