i wrote because i had a sports illustrated subscription
i read both papers every day in the library at school
not because i was smart – if i was smart i would have read my homework.
i read them because of mike royko and because sports on tv was pretty much nonexistent.
i wrote because when i sent little stories to the girls,
they smiled and
took my hand and
i wrote because there was a typewriter in the house.
when i was little a fancy car rolled past my house and stopped.
a man got out and said tony pierce?
i was 13.
i said jd salinger?
he said, here is the secret to writing,
it’s called the baseball hat.
i said, n word please.
he said, no, this is a magical one.
i said i will accept it but i would prefer one someday that will match all the Cubs crap i wear all the time.
he said im sorry thats not how it works
and tossed me a weird green one.
i haven’t washed my hands since.