1. Wednesday, November 22, 2017

    danielle in san diego asks 

    my love,

    Why do churches have so many white vans? What are they for? Why white and completely non descript.

    It’s suspect.

    To say the least.

    lovely danielle,

    theres an office building on sunset near the beverly hills line in west hollywood. it overlooks bootsy bellows.

    i got a ping today and the passenger was in front and i tried to make a u-turn but i ended up being forced to go into the parking structure, getting a little ticket but then making the u-turn and hoping that there would be no charge, there wasn’t, and finally exiting and seeing her there.

    she was in her 60s, platinum hair. law professor out here on vacation.

    as she talked i thought i heard something.

    do i detect a midwest accent? i asked.

    i’m from chicago, she said. i turned around my cap and said, did you see this?

    she laughed. no, i missed that. and we were off.

    i asked her if she went to the cubs victory parade, she said, not only that but my husband and i went to a world series game.

    it was hot today. 85 or so. the AC was on and when she said that i turned it down one tick so i could hear her clearly.

    he said, im gonna do it. i said if you do don’t tell me any of the details, she said.

    i said, tickets were four thousand dollars. each.

    she said, i told him and now i will tell you, do not tell me the details.

    she laughed.

    later i asked her something about her husband and she paused and said, he’s passed now.

    but he had a long life and got to see the Cubs win the world series after all.

    churches have white vans so they can go to baseball games undercover when they should be doing something dumb like buying wholesale incense.