i said the only thing i feel constantly guilty of,
shame isnt the word id call it,
is this blog.
this humble collection of zeros and ones floating around in the cyber space.
i said, i wish i spent more time on it, with it, through it,
pushing things, pulling things, stretching, revealing
i wish i was able to create some of the beginnings of magic i used to be able to spark back in the day, the years before punk broke.
there was a time i wouldnt have been happy only posting twice a day, let alone take whole days off
when i was young and dumb(er) and riding the bus every day i truly felt invincible
that because i had nothing, really nothing, what could you take from me.
so my girlfriend at the time took my hair.
shaved it right off.
put it in a bag and sold it to chokey chicken.
then my bad job took my bad job.
and then all these really good things happened. because of the sacrifice? yes. because of the growth? yes.
yes to all of it.
add some heat and funky fertilizer and water that shit every day and something new will happen.
so the question is, am i ready for new. newer than new. is this the new? is this the thing?
maybe its just the fertilizer.
maybe it’s time to bring the heat.