1. Tuesday, July 2, 2019

    i had a job interview yesterday for work at a cannabis company 

    it went so well.

    the guy was laughing, he was right there with me.

    when it was over he said he would call the person who this person reports to and set up a time for her to talk with me.

    i was so happy. i had researched this company Nardwaur-style. i read everything i could, i watched videos, looked at the HTML of their site in case they asked me about SEO.

    and then a few hours later he said she would talk to me today. today! perfecto!

    so we talked today. she is very smart, well spoken, she had all the answers to my questions. but it was hard to hear if she actually liked me. and she had to run to a meeting so we had to end it quickly.

    the other day i watched this video that made me cry.

    it was reactions that Cub fans had when the Cubs finally won the world series.

    old men and young women, all of them crying.

    i cried too.

    when you wait 108 years to grab the golden ring it is lovely but a bit bittersweet because of all the people who lived and died and never got to have that feeling of their team being The Best.

    after watching that video the other day it dawned on me that i have already “accomplished” my wildest dreams, seeing the Cubs in the World Series in person topped it. and going to their victory parade is something i never imagined. but there i was.

    i have had incredible jobs where we as a team had huge successes, bigger ones than i could have predicted. i have had the best girlfriends, the best friends, i live in an amazing town. i have had a good life.

    for months ive been sweating over what the next job will be. will i just work for myself? will i work for someone else? what will people think i am when they look at my resume and talk to me on the phone for a half hour?

    do they believe that the success i have had will help them achieve their dreams?

    who knows. then theres the wild card that we read in the Bible that the Lord hardens people’s hearts from time to time. mama mia.

    so i guess the thing is you have to Trust. if you’re going to believe in God, which i do, then you just have to enjoy the ride even if it takes you down roads you weren’t planning to take, and even if you’re stuck on the side of the road longer than you want.

    maybe you’re not stuck.

    maybe you’re there because there’s something for you to see.

    or maybe this is the time to read those books or podcast with those people or do that thing or get that rest or omg work out or omg go to the library.

    maybe you dont know everything and control is an illusion and

    maybe you said what is true for you in that interview

    and that is all you can do.

    the Cubs won the world series.

    all of this now is gravy.

    relax and enjoy the parade.