1. Monday, October 14, 2019

    i had my 10th carls jr beyond meat burger last night 

    i was reading exodus tonight for busblog bible study.

    this is why i get all the chicks, fyi.

    and old moses is telling pharaoh to let his people go an pharoah is all pound sand hebrew

    it’s an interesting dance of pharaoh wanting to let them go because moses is just fucking egypt up with blood in nile which kilt the fish and the dead fish were all stinky

    or frogs everywhere, even in the ovens

    then all these fucking flies swarming everywhere

    which i gotta say is a wickedly creative plague to sick on someone because it doesn’t matter if youre rich of poor, a swarm of flies is gonna ruin your day

    but pharoah wants to be cool to moses but God keeps hardening pharoahs heart

    which got me thinking this

    what if the mean girls in the cafeteria dont wanna be mean but their hearts are being hardend

    so you’ll have a reason to perform a magic trick.

    which will free your people.

    your sweet friends who have it hard enough trying to make bricks in the hot sun, but then taskmaster is like ok now do it with no straw.

    your amigos cant even express their religion properly because one of the things the jews did back then

    is they liked to sacrifice white cows.

    egyptians were like wtf, none of that! even though they had no problem being dick masters to human slaves, they drew the line in regards to killing certain animals and one of them was the super rare white cow.

    meanwhile, Moses’ buds liked to sacrifice white cows Because they were rare and were saying to God, we love you so much we will give this to you because its the best and weirdest and coolest and most beautifulest and killer cow – and it’s yours because you deserve the best.

    like you and me, Moses loved his friends so much he forgot he had stagefright and was softspoken and not as handsome as his brother Aaron, he just went up to pharoah and said dont make me put boils all over you AND your magicians,  cuz i will if you dont let em go, and i will take delight watching these boils fester and make baby boils on top of the boils.

    inspiration can come from many things. revenge is one.

    love is another.

    and harder.

    i think thats the lesson of exodus.