you dont realize it when its happening

but when we look back at 2020 and parts of 2021 we will say oh yeah it was terrible

and parts were super bad, dont let me pretend it wasnt

but other parts werent terrible, like the traffic was light

and people fucking ran if someone sneezed

crime was down, we clapped for hospital workers

shit was clean


but when i look back in the future will i even bring that stuff up

or will i say, the pressure was insane

i lost my job and had a hard time finding another one

unemployment was against me

beautiful amber and i split for a number of reasons

the cats got fleas

the cubs refused to re-sign their stars

and i didnt go to the movies or a rock show for over a year.

one silver lining:

my church got so good at doing church online.


i feel like im constantly fighting

and i dont wanna fight.

heres what i wanna do.

i wanna wake up without an alarm. i wanna roll over and someone who loves me is there snoozing away.

i wanna cook her breakfast and then feed the cats.

then i wanna go outside and get the paper and spit in the street.

i want the security guard to say xyz pdq

i want the birds to say its noon and your plant based bacon is burning

i want the weed man to say you didnt order this but we love you, here

i want the mailman to say yours is my favorite block and here are those things you forgot you ordered.

i wanna hear the most beautiful music wafting from a half cracked window up the block

i want the sun to shine on my bald head and say hi tony hi.

and when i get to the kitchen i want her to ask

dont you want some grits?

and then open her robe.

getting the exact reaction from the mailman youd expect.

so no, i dont wanna fight.