everything is a test

everything is the angels watching from above making little side bets on you

ok for sure hes gonna fuck this shit up,

one of them will say to the other

nah, he’s cool, he’s the man, he’s my favorite one now that i think of it,

the other’ll say, after exhaling a long stream of smoke.

ok i bet you a bulldozer he wont act a fool over that thing,

the first one will offer

omg what is it with you and bulldozers? fine, i’ll bet you my last bulldozer he’ll shake it off

back in the day they were betting like crazy on hank aaron,

all the shit he went through

imagine death threats just cuz youre gonna break a dumb home run record

your family in danger because you might go yard in cincy

angles be all, a hundred yaks hank’ll just retire

but hank aint retiring.

fuck quitting

fuck bowing down to the bad in the world

and fuck acting a fool.

i walk around hollywood late at night

you see different things at night

was taking the picture of a bus stop bench and this dude approached me from my blind spot

i was listening to howard stern and jimmy kimmel in my headphones

i have a little rule that if you ask me for money i’ll give it to you

actually its in the bible but ive adapted it.

i was like, what?

and he mumbled, black dude, one shoe, skinny, no eye contact


i was wondering if you could help me with some spare change

im thinking, theres a guy who owes me $2,500 out there who hasnt even had the decency to paypal me $100 every week or $500 a month

ive been unemployed since halloween

i havent even touched a woman since the traitors attacked the capitol

no relation

and still somehow i am doing better than this guy

literally in the middle of the street

at 1:30am

i have a bed. i have cable. i have clean clothes

and cookie dough in a small bucket.

i have a


so i gave him $5

bc im pretty sure the angels were betting the under.