nothing in here is true

  1. Sunday, January 5, 2014
  2. Monday, December 30, 2013

    and a shoutout to the glam squad 


    id like to thank all the angels and saints all around me

    who always have my back even though i dont always deserve it

    or ask for it


    the good book says ask and ye shall receive

    seek and ye shall find

    is there anything better than when someone you secretly love

    sidles up to you and whispers

    tony you know what i really want, i want…


    and then they tell you.

    straight up.

    no esp required.

    no palm readers, steamy cauldrons, or mind  reading


    it’s so nice and refreshing, especially when you can say, is that all baby?

    same goes with the lord. you know hes got things to do too.

    so if you say i would like a so and so in the whatchamacallit

    he might say sheeeeeeeeet id actually like to pull that off

    and poof


    now youve stoked the lord.


    so id like to thank the good spirits in my life for all of their stokes in 2013


    it was about as unexpected as i could have ever imagined, both good and bad.

    i had the longest spring break since forever.


    and it ended exactly at the right time and at the right place


    so thank you for getting me here and for being there along the way.

  3. Tuesday, July 30, 2013

    things i thought i was gonna do on my spring + summer break, things i actually did 

    quentin tarantino

    things i thought i was gonna do:

    write a screenplay that id let quentin tarantino direct

    clean my apartment

    write a novel about all the hookups ive had that were terrible

    read a couple of books

    hike runyon 3-4 times a week

    paint the walls of my apartment

    dress up like darth vader and do paintings for tourists on venice beach

    go to the movies once a week

    throw all the crap out of my closets

    things ive ended up doing so far:


    partied with the nexus

    watched the entire Game of Thones, Mad Men, Weeds, and Orange is the New Black series

    made it through season 3 of The Wire

    slept in til noon on most days, 1 on others, 2 on some rare yet remarkable days

    had a russian xbi agent climb on top of me and then poison me

    visited  frisco, vegas, and pomona

    rarely ate out, in fact cooked for myself more these last couple months than the entire 2 decades combined

    roosevelt poolapplied for jobs way out of my league and way way way below my pay grade

    chilled at the pool with moxie and ran into alie and georgia

    grew and later shaved off a pretty impressive homelessguy beard

    fell deeply in love with avocados.

    helped a friend detox from booze (without the use of restraints).

    hiked runyon 4 times. nearly passed out in runyon 1 time.

    became addicted and later deleted Candy Crush Saga from my iPhone

    did pretty well in the stock market(?!?!), somehow

    saw Tom Petty at the Henry Fonda for free thanks to Todd Martens

    went to church with a pretty girl.

    went to the library a few odd times.

    soaked in a hot tub on the rooftop of a hollywood apt on the fourth of july.

    read pretty much all of reddit.

    so yeah, #epicfail

  4. Monday, December 31, 2012

    2013 new years resolutions 

    rihanna chris brown

    1. if i find myself judging couples for not being in a textbook love affair i will immediately paypal $20 to charity.

    2. at least one hour a week dedicated to book readin

    3. just one kegstand a month.

    4. i’ll buy a new garbage can. a throw the hell away you hoarder, can. through the week i will put things from my long standing personal stash in there. each week at least one bag of old crap has gotta go.

    5. less hangovers

    6. more matinees

    7. more trips to vegas and wrigley

    8. one trip to mexico, possibly cuba

    9. less talking about the bible. more reading it.

    10. at least walk around hollywood if youre not gonna run around it.