the three best things i saw at coachella

2014 is half over which makes me wanna look back and give thanks

to the killer things ive gotten to see so far.

one thing i didnt expect to be as fun as it was was coachella.

i thought it would be too hot, and that id get too tired and the music would blow

but no it was great and miss lana del rey was a desert oasis

she opened her set with the provocative Cola which spilled out into the front row

tasty

the replacements were the main reason i was there and Paul hurt his back

so they pulled out a couch for him to lay on

and life pulled out Billie Joe Armstrong from Green Day to play with them

on pretty much every song. he even sang I’m In Trouble while Paul lounged.

typical unpredictable Replacements action for 75 minutes.

arcade fire played so long coachella shut their mics off

but that didnt stop them from being awesome

they did one little acoustic victory lap around so everyone knew what to sing

as they all went on their long journeys to their cars in the parking lot

last night i was at a swanky westside party talking about chuck e cheese

chuck e cheese

i told the hosts that earlier in the day i saw that the kiddie pizza parlor place was opening a new location near mccarthur park

and they were all have you seen the underground chuck e cheese band do that usher song

incredibly as in we must show you this very second

we watched it twice it was so good and so funny especially at a party where a moose head overlooked us from above.

i was like i really hope whoever was able to do that gets hit up one day by a chuck e cheese franchise owner

like the one in this new venue who might find it profitable to open it up on friday nights to non-kids

so they can drink beer, eat bad pizza and watch The Rock-afire Explosion.

after my nap today i did a little research and it looks like theres at least two programmers

who have no problem putting the robots to the paces of contemporary music like

Arcade Fire

Black Eyed Peas

Madonna:

and even Austin’s own Quiet Company(?!?!?):

imagine the possibilities

why i hate hipsters, whoever they are

angus youngthey have no respect for the electric guitar.

in the 50s chuck berry played it like he was ringing a bell

in the 60s jimi hendrix and jimmy page played it like it was an alien creature

in the 70s angus young and his brother malcolm took power cords to a whole new level

in the 80s van halen guns n roses and metallica took hair- and speed metal and shoved it right into Top 40s face

in the 90s kurt cobain j mascis and thurston moore turned it into brutally powerful art pop

and then the hipsters were born and nothing

NOTHING

five decades of real rock & roll handed to them via Napster, BitTorrent and now Spotify and Rdio taught them nothing

classic rock radio, guitar hero, and Behind The Music

and they bow to whatever dipshit DJ builds the most sparkly golden calf.

and give Coldplay three nights at the Hollywood Bowl

and omg die when Daft Punk slows it all down like they wish Mumford & Sons would.

they disgust me.

none of that is music.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs, fine. Quiet Company, fine. Arcade Fire, fine.

Black Keys: meh

other than them – none of them can hold a candle to AC/DC or even Foreigner.

Billy Freakin Squier laughs at bearded wonders who call themselves lead guitarists today

but me, i just cry inside.

and wish the Nuge would just shut up and play

Ted Nugent