nothing in here is true

  1. Monday, December 8, 2014

    today is bree’s birthday, she’s 24 


    there are many reasons to love bree but the best is because she’s one of the few remaining

    real bloggers in the world.

    many have dropped off the face of the world and that’s sad.

    but whats super great about bree is not only is she still blogging but she’s more honest and critical and insightful than ever.

    which isnt easy. especially when some of the people you’re blogging about are reading you.

    whether it is work people, friends, boyfriends, whoever, if bree has an opinion about them she will let it out.

    we need more of this.

    i need to be more like this.

    tonight bree is having a birthday party in a sweet spot but sadly i cant make it because of

    xbi commitments, but i will make it up to her very soon

    tonight she will be surrounded by many of her friends, they will take outrageous photo booth pics

    and eat pizza and celebrate this very special young lady who has turned into the type of person we all hope to be:

    someone Gwen Stefani would approve of.

    happy birthday bree! see you on the hiking trail!

  2. Friday, August 2, 2013

    bree and i investigated the high fire danger yesterday in burbank 

    high fire danger

    which turned into a steep hike on a crazy mountain overlooking beautiful downtown burbank

    pretty much the hardest hike ive ever been on

    but it was nice to be above the smog line for a while


    afterwards we treated ourselves to some in n out

    i am a carnivore selfish person so i had the cheeseburger and three deals of ketchup

    bree is a vegetarian so she had the grilled cheese and animal style fries and for some reason i only gave her two deals

    maybe i was just lightheaded and not thinking right. yeah thats probably it.

    in n out grilled cheese and animal style fries

    as i was driving home i stopped at a light and saw my childhood dreamcar rolling up beside me.

    back in the day youd actually order your vette with all that writing on it and people would be omg youre the coolest

    but if you ask me the dudes blue tooth really ties the whole thing together.

    1978 corvette pace car

    took a quick shower and drove over to have a happy hour beer with paige

    on the way i saw an excellent mural which is really ad ad for a summer tv series on FX ive never heard of

    but will check out solely because of this killer painting

    mural ad

    forgot to tell paige about it as we sat in a hollywood beer garden watching people drink liter glasses of german brew


    while sipping out of mason jars being served to us by a conflicted young man who grew up in ohio but who loved

    the michigan wolverines.

    middle of the week afternoon day drinking

    must have attracted every midwesterner in town cuz we ran into this guy


    and took his picture because that shirt was just way sweet

  3. Saturday, June 8, 2013

    it was a tough week for bree, she and her man split up 


    as a reader of her blog, twitter and instagram i knew it was affecting her greatly

    but then last night i was very nervous when she tweeted “here’s what i’m thinking

    with a link to this image of some ominous writing on her wrist.

    so i texted her and said she probably should drink or nap or stay away from sharp objects.

    she said she was very interested in sharp objects

    and i was all, well sometimes its ok when people cut us off

    because maybe that means they weren’t right for us. not everyones gonna get you.

    and sometimes those are the people you want to understand you the most.

    she was all blah blah blah whatevs tony



    thank God she was merely talking about – and then getting – her first tattoo.


  4. Saturday, January 12, 2013

    tsar and nerfherder played the bootleg again friday 

    bree had never seen tsar before and tsar delivered big time.

    because LA is really a small place my coworker sanden totten just happened to be there

    and he also had never seen Tsar and loved them so much he bought the new cd and their b-sides.

    he used to be a punk rock singer so its pretty high praise to just be at a show

    and be so blown away by a band you know nothing about that you buy everything theyve got.

    so im gonna make him a little spotify playlist to highlight the highlights.

    i hope tsar tours all over california so everyone can love them.

    oh look, they are:


  5. Thursday, November 29, 2012
  6. Monday, October 15, 2012

    bree and i figured out the best way to give people uncomfortable messages 


    ok, say you wanna tell someone youre just not into them any more

    or that you cant go to their party

    or that you made out with their sister

    or that you dont want them to be in your band any more:

    you send them a really beautiful but omg so nswf email

    and underneath the photo it says “sorry romeo, bree isn’t into it. but the good news, heres some porn.”

    once it takes off dudes can just see each other in the hallway at work and be all

    why so glum, chad?

    and bro will go, dude i got some porn just now.

    and his buddy will understand immediately and be like, im so sorry, lets have beers after work.

    you’re welcome.

  7. Thursday, February 2, 2012

    bree wants to know who your first crush was 

    mine was kristin burke. first grade. first phone number i ever got.
    she lived exactly one block away but for some reason i wanted her number.
    i was adorable, she was adorable, who isnt adorable when youre 7 ?

    on top of her normal adorable ness in cluding freckles
    she was on the first grade swim team.
    we had a pool exactly one and a half blocks away.
    so her blonde hair got blonder because of the chlorine and sun.

    so i was all hey whats your phone number and i got it and the next day
    we both got off the bus and i ran home and waited a few minutes
    climbed the step stool to the kitchen phone that was on the wall and i
    her phone number, and she answered and who knows what we talked about

    one day some of the boys started throwing rocks at girls
    and kristin walked by.
    ever since first grade my rock throwing aim has been uncanny.
    but i didnt wanna hit kristin burke with no rock.
    i didnt know what i wanted to do but not that.
    so i threw it way over her head
    right through someones windshield.
    and ran

    and then called her an hour later or so.

    dont get any taller i said.

  8. Tuesday, December 6, 2011
  9. Wednesday, July 6, 2011

    bree is on to something for sure 

    I want to tromp around in a dress that shouldn’t be tromped around in (did I just make up that word?),

    I want to spend Sunday mornings sleeping in to the soundtrack of a heartbeat,

    I want to celebrate the here and now and not feel like every promise is a chain link to a cinder block

    that’s sinking to the bottom of the Pacific Ocean.

    from her post “Here’s What I Want

  10. Wednesday, April 27, 2011

    someone complained that there is rarely photographic evidence of me 

    in las vegasin any of my adventures around this beautiful land.

    and while nothing in this is true, and you should question any photo you see on the internet, most of the time you dont see me because im the one taking the pictures.

    also i love taking the pictures.

    also im sure my audience would rather see the cool people i get to party with instead of me.

    with that said, heres one of the few pictures from last weekend’s vegas shenanigans where i made an appearance on film

    on the left there is michelle, a bartender and undercover cop from massachussetts.

    under her is karisas sister in law za za.

    then you have your hero.

    on top of moi is karisas little sister.

    then theres karisa recovering from sunstroke or maybe just regular stroke.

    and next to her is her personal handler, mary.

    we are poolside of the hard rock, good call, bree.

    on the table are various drinks. but i want you to look at the plastic cups with the straws coming out of them.

    the far right one is my screwdriver. keyword is screw. why?

    check it, that drink cost $28 before tip. and i gotta say, onlya bout 1/8 of it was booze. so like 4-5 shots. tops. probably closer to four.

    im not complaining too much, i mean you should know when youre trying to pull off the rock star high roller moves like renting a cabana at the hottest pool in all of vegas over a holiday weekend youre gonna have to pay.

    and in the long run they give you so many free drinks when youre gambling that it all evens out.

    and trust me, none of us had a hard time chasing the buzz.

    im just saying buyer beware. before you order a poolside drink, you might wanna figure out your options if youre working on a budget, like many of us are.

    ok theres your life lesson for the day and your precious pic of yr favorite blogger getting his drink on

    now take on the day