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nothing in here is true

  1. Monday, January 27, 2014

    every day i take a picture of someone, today, wait what? 

    kris kardashianKim Kardashian’s mom and I were waiting for the valet today.

    I said, “I loved your talk show”.

    She smiled.

    I said, “can I have a picture?”

    She said, “ok”.

    I got ready and she said “no no no, only if we’re together”.

    So I said “one two three selfieee”!

    and of course screwed up the pic entirely.

    or did i?

    if you ask me this is my favorite type of selfie

    enough of me that youre all oh yeah

    but rarely am i the star of the show

    it’s usually the other person which is fine with me.

    i get enough love, and lord knows i know what i look like.

    the goal here is to see what the other people look like and mrs kardashian looked fantastic and was polite

    and even asked me what i did for a living

    which is so sweet.

    i said i write acceptance speeches for Daft Punk.