nothing in here is true

  1. Saturday, November 24, 2018

    amber enjoys filling my schedule with outings 

    i explain to her that i am working on something

    that quite literally may save another person’s life.

    and she’ll say, so you *don’t* wanna go to the HBO Holiday party?

    you don’t wanna have thanksgiving with firefighters who could have died

    you dont wanna go to the dirtiest fashion show of all

    you dont wanna take in a twisted art show?

    you dont wanna go to roaring 20s bash at a high class haunted hotel?

    i tried to tell her a long time ago that i am older than i feel

    i have traveled through time back and forth and theres very little under the sun that i have not seen

    plus i love wearing pajamas and rarely get invited somewhere where thats the dress code

    the one exception is Bree invited us to her place for a Sunday morning pajama party brunch.

    i think that because shes pregnant she’s not crazy with the limited amount of clothing options that she has, and she wants a party, thus PJs

    only problem is Da Bears play on Sunday mornings and i might be jumping up and down in front of a TV. so lets hope they move it to a night game and then everyone can win.

    amber has the perfect onesie.

  2. Wednesday, May 27, 2015

    there was a time when ladies were basically naked all the time 

    naked white ladies

    which must have been something to see because the painters sure painted the hell out of it.

    but what i like were the babies seemed to have more on the ball than they do now.

    i never saw a baby from the olden times with a pacifier or a blanket that they were obsessed with.

    there were no ipads blasting Dora the Explora to keep them occupied.

    they were just naked and fat and basically short little humans.

    what happened to us?

    now there are clothes and jackets and ponchos and hats and scarves.

    women wear the biggest scarves these days. they even have a name for the giant things,

    although i cannot recall it.

    Material is really all it is. huge swaths of stuff.

    personally im glad we cover up a little nowadays. i get distracted by belly shirts and knee highs.

    which i stopped wearing them.

  3. Tuesday, December 24, 2013

    obey sample sale: giant success 

    obey sign outside

    if you know me, you know that my favorite part of Christmas is the world famous Obey Sample Sale.

    the only nuisance for this 114 year old man is the lines can sometimes be 3-4 hours,

    as etienne and i experienced two years ago.

    but a nice busblog reader who works at Obey Giant was nice enough to give me a Friends & Family pass for Friday

    sadly i had to work late Friday so ali was all, hey lets try to get up early on Saturday and go down there

    ali 1

    when we arrived there was a super long line, food trucks, and a band playing

    but ali said, just go ask the nice man eating the burrito if our pass could be accepted today.

    so i thought good thoughts and handed him the pass and he gave ali and i VIP badges  and in 0 seconds we were in!

    obey sign inside

    after selling the xbi mobile i suddenly had a few extra bucks in my paypal account which is dangerous

    because if it has an obey logo, especially an andre the giant logo, i’ll be very tempted to buy it

    obey stencil

    which is even more dangerous thanks to the fact that the VIP badge meant we had no time limit in the warehouse.

    time limit? yes. back in the day Obey realized that the best way to keep the line moving

    is to restrict people’s shopping sprees to just 30 minutes.

    not only does it let more people in the place, but it creates a tad of a frenzied atmosphere

    obey shirts mens

    that mixed with the amazing deals ($40 shirts for $10, $120 jackets for $40, etc)

    and the dj playing punk rock and gangsta rap

    mad house

    had people filling the aisles and stuffing their garbage bags with sweet ass bargains.


    hats were $10 or 3 for $25, for example.

    at those prices who doesn’t want a doberman sitting next to a flaming garbage can hat!?


    or any variety of these chapeaus for yr former fro?!

    empty bins

    needless to say the supplies went fast but the replenishers replenished quickly

    baby shopping

    this lady got the last baby. lucky.

    womens shirts

    indeed they had lots of new stuff including an expanded womens area.

    happy ali

    ali was stoked

    baby checkout

    the baby was exhausted

    for the kids

    and everyone who brought a toy for a kid or food for the hungry got a free cap. these were all who were that sweet.

    checkout lines

    most people had one bag of stuffs. i had two. two bags set me back $230.

    which accounted for two hoodies, a varsity jacket, a backpack, a belt, a striped shirt, a thick flannel, a thin flannel,

    two tshirts, three hats, and a beautiful sweater.

    my booty

    merry christmas has a posse!