nothing in here is true

  1. Wednesday, April 9, 2014

    it was only a matter of time before a transexual porn star ubered me 


    can you take me to the drug store and then subway and wait for me while i get all the stuff? also do you have a phone charger, i think i left mine in the dungeon.

    what were you doing in the dungeon i asked hoping she’d say she was the lighting or sound person

    10169098_10152316717223057_1866407798_ninstead she said, losing my self respect.

    we were driving down wilshire. pretty close to where rfk was assassinated.

    i said, well hopefully you lost that well before you entered the dungeon.

    laughs. drug store didnt work out so we started looking for subway sandwiches. she was asking her Siri, i had Waze it was a very confusing situation because we were both struggling for control but the customer is always right and we did a whole circle and ended up a half block from the drug store. and i waited.

    finally she came back and said the line was too long there. but then convinced herself it would be cheaper just to wait, minus me running the meter.

    i felt relieved because you only make like twenty cents a minute if youre waiting. its so not worth it. we said too-da-loo and i was off again.

    got this guy who used to go to hamilton high. wanted me to take him to literally South Central avenue.

    he was surprised that i knew of hamilton high but i didnt let on that i knew it from when i was overseeing a bunch of reporters at kpcc and i fought to keep one of our best writers on hamilton instead of getting distracted by miramonte. and because of that we got the scoop.

    hamilton had the teacher of the year… who was also allegedly doing some of the boys. it was a creative magnet school focusing on the performing arts.

    my passenger said the teacher was soooo good at piano and was a really good teacher but it didnt surprise him that 22 former students said he was inappropriate with them because “he liked to get really close to you when he explained things”

    and he was very touchy feely.

    10178461_10152316592103057_1050089393_npassenger said right after the allegations made the LA Times there he was at the Disney Hall for an Alvin Allie dance performance costarring one of his recently graduated students. passenger said he went up to him and said, you have Some nerve being here right now.

    omg dramz

    dropped him off right next to the police station where hayley and i did the ridealong a year and a half ago and i got back to downtown

    there i picked up two younguns who were super british and two swedes.

    one of them had this see through plastic skirt and a great tshirt. so much style!

    as luck would have it the three left her at one apartment and i was to drive her alone to the other.

    so after i asked if she wouldnt mind if i took a picture of her outfit and she said no probs

    after i said Hay-dough which means adios in swedish.

    then when i least expected it i got beeped by Hathaway.

    only one Hathaway in all of LA, and its the one i worked with at E! 12 years ago. maybe 14.

    she was there with another ex coworker, Aimee. omg what a small world we live in.

    why was i driving tonight?

    because it was super warm. like beautifully warm

    and also because i had just spent $800 on coachella vip and i want to pay it off before the bill comes.

    someone helped me get the ticket and i said oh i have the perfect thank you gift, whats your addy?

    and she said are you nuts you paid full hit on that ticket we’re good.

    i said, yes but theyre “sold out”. she said but you still paid money.

    i said theres only two reasons i have money: to pay rent and to see rock shows.

    and even though we laughed it is so true.

  2. Saturday, January 11, 2014

    paul asks, “in order who are the bands, by day you wanna see at Coachella”? 

    the replacements

    Friday: The Replacements, Bryan Ferry, The Afghan Whigs, The Cult, Girl Talk, Outkast, John Spencer Blues Explosion, Dum Dum Girls, Preatures

    Saturday: Lorde, Pet Shop Boys,  Foxygen, Pharrell Williams, Nas,  Muse, Warpaint, The Internet, Skrillex

    Sunday: Arcade Fire, Lana Del Rey, Motorhead, Beck, Fishbone, Surfer Blood, Trombone Shorty, Little Dragon, Beady Eye, Toy Dolls

  3. Wednesday, January 8, 2014
  4. Monday, April 15, 2013
  5. Sunday, April 14, 2013
  6. Friday, April 12, 2013
  7. Thursday, January 24, 2013

    the red hot chili peppers? 


    i’ll bet you twenty bucks Coachella will do something actually interesting that night

    like add Kendrick Lamar

    or have Jimmy Page, Jack Black, Jack White, and John Paul Jones

    all show up wearing nothing but socks

    and play Houses of the Holy all the way through with the Peppers

    because NO WAY did Al Gore invent Coachella so that

    the same band who just sold out Staples Center two nights in a row

    off a pretty mediocre record, is bringing anything truly magical

    to such a magical yearly event.

    i have nothing but love for them, but seriously theres no added benefit to them there as is.

    youre almost better off just saving your money and just letting the Yeah Yeah Yeahs headline

    or Dinosaur Jr.

    or Tsar

  8. Sunday, November 4, 2012

    no doubt in hot water, pulls “Looking Hot” because of backlash 

    gwen stefani in hot water

    on their website the LA band says they were responding to native americans who found it offensive

    “As a multi-racial band our foundation is built upon both diversity and consideration for other cultures. Our intention with our new video was never to offend, hurt or trivialize Native American people, their culture or their history. Although we consulted with Native American friends and Native American studies experts at the University of California, we realize now that we have offended people. This is of great concern to us and we are removing the video immediately. The music that inspired us when we started the band, and the community of friends, family, and fans that surrounds us was built upon respect, unity and inclusiveness. We sincerely apologize to the Native American community and anyone else offended by this video. Being hurtful to anyone is simply not who we are.”

    id like more details on what the native americans, or as my canadian friends more accurately call them, First Nations, find offensive about this – and something tells me we will, which is good because we need to keep learning about each other.

    but in the meantime i will say i think Gwen looks more amazing than all the Coachella girls wearing these styles combined

    and since shes 67 years old, i find that fascinating.

    update: ok, here’s a portion of a compelling note posted on a No Doubt message board about why First Nations are against this video specifically

    …I loved No Doubt. Even later as I have been attending college “Just a Girl” helped me realize I was in a bad relationship. This is why I was deeply saddened to see the music video for “Looking Hot.” As a Native woman whose college educated mother chose to raise me on the reservation in order to be close to my culture and always be proud of who I am and where I came from, I was deeply offended by your trivialization of my culture. Eagle feathers, beadwork designs, the way that you fix your hair, even down to the colors that are used in traditional regalia all have spiritual and/or religious meaning for American Indian people. Many of these dances that we do at powwows have been done for hundreds of years and have a ceremonial purpose behind them. Being tied up in a prisoner type situation singing, “Go ahead and look at me ‘Cause that’s what I want” does more than add insult to injury. It makes light of American Indian woman that were raped and brutalized during U.S. colonization of America. It makes light of the genocidal policies of the U.S. government committed against American Indian nations. Dancing around a fire scantily “dressed like an American Indian woman” thrusting singing “Go ahead and stare at my ragamuffin” takes a whole new meaning when you take into account the current startling statistic that 1 in 3 American Indian woman will be raped in her lifetime and most of these will be by non-Native perpetrators. As somebody who lived through a sexual assault, I do not take this portrayal as fun and games. We as American Indian people cannot afford to. The rate of suicide among American Indian youth, ages 15 to 24, is the highest of any racial group. The media imagery of our people does affect minds and attitudes not just of the predominant culture’s view of us but the self-esteem of our own young people. It does so easily when American History classes do every individual taking them a severe injustice. All of this has real effects on our lives as we struggle to live in two worlds: the white world that constantly tells us that we are insignificant as our culture and traditions are constantly made a mockery of and the Native world which tells we need to learn our languages and ceremonies and protect them as sacred as we are in danger of losing this part of us. I hope that No Doubt and others will choose to recognize and rectify this publicly.

  9. Tuesday, October 2, 2012
  10. Tuesday, July 17, 2012

    i think i wanna go on the S.S. Coachella 

    SS Coachella

    Do i like the bands?

    Pulp, Hot Chip, Yeasayer, Girl Talk, James Murphy (DJ Set), Sleigh Bells, Simian Mobile Disco, Z-Trip, !!!, Warpaint, DJ Harvey, El-P, Killer Mike, Black Lips, The Gaslamp Killer, Grimes, Cloud Nothings, Jason Bentley. The Rapture (DJ Set). Father John Misty, Tokimonsta, Alf Alpha


    Do I think the worst part about Coachella is where and how much it will cost to lay one’s head at night?


    Do I think the second worst part about Coachella is where does one nap comfortably and safely?


    So since the biggest pre-stress about Coachella for me has to do with sleeping,

    it’s nice i wouldnt have to worry about that.

    ss coachella

    so what are the plusses to this concert on the sea?

    free room service for some reason

    Girl Talk

    the pool could be either amazing or disgusting

    the price:

    prob $1,666 when all is said and done

    for four days.

    good thing i just have that sorta money laying around