23rd birthday. the love of my life. the girl of my dreams. my baby momma.
born to immigrant sharecroppers, kristin bounced out of the stagecoach and was befriended by native americans whom she traded shoes for half of oklahoma.
it was with these natives that she got her name Madpony because of the little horse who was jealous of the attention the tribe was paying to the infant girl.
once of age to realize her fortune, she offered to give back all the land to the indian tribe who found her parents.
although she doesnt really look that much like the people who claimed her, and nothing like the blonde woman who identifies herself as kristin’s “sister”, our girl was brought up in a loving suburban home where she collected stamps, made the cheerleading squad and electronically conversed with men four times her age.
rarely without a boyfriend, kristin met a handsome oilman right before the busblog rolled into town and being the smart man that he is, he popped a ring on her finger before she could be
kidnapped wooed into moving to california.
oh well. never have i crushed on a sorority girl before. never have i driven to oklahoma before. never have my dreams been smashed so.
but we’ll always have memphis.
and please tell your sister to stop emailing me nude photos of herself with your head photoshopped on top. THE CARPET DOESNT MATCH THE WINDOW DRESSING, CHICA!
happy birthday madpony kristin, hottest chick in all oklahomey. if i didnt already have a beautiful attorney you would definitely be mine.