nothing in here is true

  1. Tuesday, August 7, 2018
  2. Wednesday, January 6, 2016

    we’ve had two inches of rain, maybe less 

    el ninoyet because of crap in the sewers and drains, we flood easily.

    why is there crap in there? because we hardly get any rain. we’ve been involved in a long running drought.

    leaves get in there, garbage, branches, guns, ammo, the courage of politicians, the dreams of the broken hearted, rock n roll, good turkey burger recipes,

    creative ways to bring back the record industry, the poor, all my cheap sunglasses, all the quarterbacks that could lead the Bears back to the Super Bowl, nachos

    starbucks coffee cups with pictures of Jesus on them, spider-man sequels, newpapers who actually try to gear their news towards minorities and young people,

    bernie sanders supporters, ron paul supporters, american idol viewers, half burned hoverboards, go cart tires, sissy bars, typewriters, atari consoles, the ideals of thirtysomethings who instead buy bmws and couches they see on pinterest

    craft beer bottles, hooker mattresses, jawbreakers, needle nose pliers, my afro, corded phones, freshly beaten fax machines, radio shack signs, lost balloons, circuit cities, dunkin donuts munchkins, white zombie cds, pens with erasers on them, good ideas by network execs,

    network execs, tom from myspace, all the bass players of smashing pumpkins, smashed pumpkins, barrels of kale, lost kittens, burnt couches, burnt hippies, affordable housing, the loch ness monster, the missing link, iraqi aluminum tubes, glenn beck’s career, everyones childhood big wheel

    remote controls, turkey basters, library cards, self addressed stamped envelopes, tupac, my left foot, the blogosphere and


  3. Sunday, January 3, 2016

    what i did over my Christmas vacation 

    making a murderer

    1. watched all of Fargo – weirdly i liked season one best
    2. made money
    3. brunched with ali and aj
    4. told a babe to meet me in a DTLA alley at midnight for new years
    5. watched all of making a murderer and had all sorts of feels
    6. played a bunch of NBA y2k2015
    7. played a bunch of NBA Jam
    8. clipped the cats nails
    9. ate poorly
    10. then ate well
    11. bought MLB.tv streaming for this season
    12. changed my sheets