nothing in here is true

  1. Sunday, June 28, 2015

    the ever wise ashley rose once told me that im never satisfied 

    case closed

    at the time she was 19 and i was in my 30s and some of my female friends would judgingly ask me

    what could you two possibly talk about?

    little did they know that we actually talked a lot about everything all the time

    possibly because she was eerily insightful, particularly about the things she obsessed about

    and for that little stretch of time it was me.

    i thought of her last night as i was at the so-called N.W.A reunion

    so-called because Dr. Dre chose not to attend

    which made it an Ice Cube MC Ren DJ Yella reunion, which is nice but come on.

    with Eazy resting in peace you really need Dre there even more and without him there,

    well let’s just say that even with incredible seats, i was a pouty little disappointed man.

    not even three huge beers helped.


    it’s not wrong to want things. or expect what is being advertised.

    but of the surviving members of Niggaz Wit Attitudes,

    Dr. Dre is just as important as Ice Cube

    and the fact that he took what he learned as their DJ and producer

    and parlayed that into a legendary solo record and incredible post- NWA producing efforts

    makes his fans want him to show up with the ganstas who got him there

    that much more.

    bus drinking water

    his buddy snoop dogg was the opener for Ice Cube and MC Ren and Yella

    yes snoop dogg, who probably would NOT be on the stage if it wasnt for Dre

    snoop dogg, dre’s sidekick immediately after leaving the worlds most dangerous group

    Dre’s “The Chronic” is just as much Snoop’s coming out party as it is Dre’s.

    the only person missing was Eminem, and guess what, he doesn’t like to leave the house neither.

    so yes i was disappointed

    just hours after being hugely satisfied and thrilled about marriage equality becoming law.

    it was nice to feel that feeling of satisfaction because it’s nice to know that im capable of it.

    but man was it sad to be let down by and decent rap show at the basketball stadium.

    Ice Cube


    the girls were pretty

    and the cookie tasted good.

  2. Saturday, June 27, 2015

    im seeing N.W.A tonight, snoop dogg and kendrick lamar opening 

    nothing in here

    picked up a pretty girl today while ubering and she wanted to hear hip hop

    one thing led to another we start talking about how Ice Cube is headlining the BET Experience tonight

    and he’s gonna rock out with DJ Yella and MC Ren

    and maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe

    Dr. Dre

    (a dj on the mic, ask what its like its like we getting hyped tonight)


    on one hand its Cube giving it up to the kids who love his music

    but also in a month or two theres gonna be an n.w.a movie coming out

    the one that suge knight was on the set of

    when he got pissed at someone and ran him over with his escalade.

    and will probably get life for murder.

    so why not celebrate the worlds most dangerous group

    in DTLA, killer seats,

    on a saturday night in the


    states of america


    she said im flying to poland and i cant go.

    i was all why are you doing that

    she said im a model and i hardly ever get to go home.

    i said how could i ever thank you

    she said get me to the airport as fast as you can so i can get on the plane.

    she told me the food in LA is terrible

    too salty or two sweet.

    i wanted to tell her about soul food, but she was on a roll.


    ive seen ice cube once, maybe twice

    snoop dogg once

    kendrick once

    and n.w.a never and i love them and they love you right back

    and dr dre better get his black billionaire ass on that stage.

  3. Tuesday, August 13, 2013
  4. Tuesday, January 22, 2013
  5. Wednesday, December 12, 2012

    12/12/12? im being told that means today is N.W.A day 

    pretty sure if i had kids i would have screwed this one up

    and my poor little jasper would have been scarred forever

    which is why i take my hat off to the enthusiastic gentleman with the adorable accent.

    in other news my back worsened this morning so im home in bed drinking rum.

  6. Tuesday, November 27, 2012

    let the hollow points commence to pop pop pop 

    next month is the 20th anniversary of The Chronic.

    even though i felt i had been there forever, 20 years ago i was still new to the xbi

    so they sent me to new orleans for some, uh, training.

    jeanine and i were super in love so i brought her, against their wishes

    but whatevs, everything worked out. and today jeanine reminisced on facebook

    I’m finally getting caught up on my LA Weekly reading, re: “The Making of the Chronic” article. Somewhere there exists a VHS tape of me n’ Tony on a Spring Break vay-cay, in the one and only town of Gretna, LA, on our way to the French Quarter, listening to Dr. Dre’s just-released album. During the course of eight days,we had Popeye’s Chicken, tried Hurricanes and muffalettas for the first time, went to that restaurant where they filmed the Folger’s Coffee commercial, ate beignets at Cafe Du Monde, and in the midst of many downright tropical rainstorms, found a killer guitar shop that had a super awesome Herb Ellis ES-165 Gibson, vintage sunburst (I think) that I actually got to play for a while, a la Joe Pass style. Throughout, we agreed that The Chronic was a totally freakin’ awesome album.

    today she told me the nicest thing:

    we’ve known each other longer than we havent known each other

    humble brag: a few years ago Geoff Boucher took me to meet Dr. Dre and Jimmy Iovine. apparently they had decided that they were going to get into the headphones business. beats by dre or something crazy. they wanted geoff to listen to them. so he brought me.

    i got to meet everyone, i listened to the headphones. i handed them over to geoff

    and then i took this picture:

    proof that real life is often stonier than the green stuff.

    sometimes moreso in retrospect.