nothing in here is true

  1. Wednesday, November 11, 2020

    the pete sousa movie is incredible 

    i cried.

    and it was inspiring.

    one thing i have always admired with politicians is how they can remember peoples names.

    if im ever in an office again i want to make a little game out of remembering everyones names because even though i try to be friendly with everyone, probably the greatest show of respect is to remember everyones names.

    i just get so scared that i will say mary instead of juanita or something.

    the other thing i loved about the film was Pete said he was on call 24/7 for 8 years.

    it reminded me of this hollywood agent i watched a few interviews with.

    he has a max of 30 clients and he has a simple rule with them, if he calls them and they don’t pick up or call back ASAP, it’s over between them.

    likewise, even if he’s giving an interview, his ground rule is he will always pick up or text back ASAP if they contact him.

    so even in his interviews he is checking his phone constantly.

    because of that, he’s a renowned agent and people are fighting to be repped by him if someone falls off.

    i’d like to be that reliable to someone.

    i would like the people i work with feel like they are as important to me as if obama texted them.

    why not?

    even at my busiest, really, how many phone calls did i get?

    it can be done.

  2. Sunday, April 5, 2020

    i believe people are more good than bad too 

    I see a lot of people watching old baseball games on YouTube, and that’s fine. But this morning I watched Barack Obama’s last press conference as POTUS to see if I could notice any differences and similarities to the pressers we have been watching recently.

    I had forgotten that the last question that he took was from a reporter who had been covering him for a very long time. The context is HRC had won by 3 million votes, but, thanks to the Electoral College someone else got to be president.

    Imagine your favorite sports team soundly thumping its opponent, but losing due to some ancient rule that today makes no sense, and now the coach has to answer questions from the press in the “loser’s” locker room.

    This part struck me as something you’d have expected a speech writer to have crafted over some time, but it just eased out of him.

    “I believe in this country. I believe in the American people. I believe that people are more good than bad. I believe tragic things happen. I believe there’s evil in the world, but I think that at the end of the day, if we work hard, and if we are true to those things in us that feel true and feel right that the world gets a little better each time. That’s what this presidency has tried to be about.”


  3. Friday, July 12, 2019

    ive been watching people on youtube who flip things 

    they’ll go to garage sales, thrift stores and estate sales and buy things and run home and sell it on ebay.

    the more professional ones will also have an amazon seller account so they can sell them there too.

    watching these guys made me want to see if i could first sell all the crap I have in my house and then maybe i could think about being a junk flipper like my hero fred g sanford.

    as i was watching one of these guys i noticed i had this Obama action figure, still in the box, under the tv.

    so i looked on ebay to see how many other people were selling them. Just one guy… for $190 shipped.

    like me, the guy is super honest and mentions that a corner of the box is slightly damaged… just like mine is.

    but inside, obi wan obama is experiencing no drama.

    for some reason i went to amazon to see if they sold it there still, after four years, and not only do they, but it reminded me that that’s where i bought this… for $16.34

    however their resellers are selling it for between $400-$450. so this is what i’m thinking. i’m thinking about writing a less dramatic ebay headline than

    Obama Star Wars Rare Jedi Knight Figure Purple lightsaber New In box has damage

    and list it at $325. i’ll show them the minor blemish on the corner and if they choose to go for the $200 one, fine. scram. now i have the lowest price Obama and i will profit over $300.

    millions of people love our greatest black president.

    there are two who want this super rare weird action figure.

  4. Wednesday, March 21, 2018

    To the students of Parkland, from Barack and Michelle Obama 

    We wanted to let you know how inspired we have been by the resilience, resolve and solidarity that you have all shown in the wake of unspeakable tragedy.

    Not only have you supported and comforted each other, but you’ve helped awaken the conscience of the nation, and challenged decision-makers to make the safety of our children the country’s top priority.

    Throughout our history, young people like you have led the way in making America better. There may be setbacks; you may sometimes feel like progress is too slow in coming. But we have no doubt you are going to make an enormous difference in the days and years to come, and we will be there for you.

    Barack Obama Michelle Obama

  5. Monday, January 23, 2017
  6. Friday, January 20, 2017
  7. Thursday, January 12, 2017
  8. Thursday, November 10, 2016

    last night, the first night of president elect Pussy Grabber, the people marched 

    day 1they marched in Seattle and Portland and New York City and Chicago

    and Oakland and Frisco and when they took to the streets in LA they took the most important street, the Hollywood Freeway.

    they held signs that said Fuck Trump and Not My President

    but my favorite was one that simply said NO

    because that’s what i said when i heard the first result Tuesday evening.

    No, not like how you feel when you drop your triple scoop ice cream to the ground accidentally when you’re 10 years old

    but how you feel when the richest guy on tv slaps that ice cream from your hand

    and millions of your countrymen and women applaud.

    the cops were no match for the protesters in NY and LA because there were far too many pissed off Americans. this is a president who has no clue and doesn’t want a clue. for every lie from Hillary, Trump lied 20 times. But his supporters don’t care and they’ll tell you they don’t care. seemingly what they care about is Them and only Them. and by Them i mean people who look like Them who didn’t feel that the previous president was them.

    but how was Barack Hussein Obama, a half black half white kid raised by his mom who got a scholarship to Harvard and then worked the mean streets of the South Side of Chicago not them? was he too smart? is that why they relate to Trump? did they feel intimidated by the Community Organizer? or did they feel uptight that America didn’t need a full white guy to fix the place?

    first a black and then a woman? was that the white man’s fear? were they afraid that this would be the beginning of the phasing out of the Bro Culture?

    we don’t know because they lied to the pollsters, they lie to the press, and when asked now why they voted for the man with zero experience, all they say is Because He’s Going to Make America Great Again.

    when George W was reelected this blog turned its header black. i was just as confused then as i am now. back then i wondered how people who saw four years of 9/11 and its pathetic aftermath could reelect an imbecile liar who mishandled pretty much everything that he touched. i was despondent, i was angry, i was confused, and i felt alienated from the country i loved.

    but out of that suffering came Obama.

    the Light.

    they say sometimes you don’t appreciate things until it’s taken away.

    the ironic thing about the millions who voted Trump is in a few years tens of millions will look back and say holy shit Obama was amazing and i took it for granted. i am so sorry.

    yes you are sorry.

  9. Friday, August 12, 2016

    i may not be a huge success but im not a fucking sellout asshole liar 

    head of the DEA

    this is Drug Enforcement Administration chief Chuck Rosenberg.

    just look at him.

    his whole life he has seen people smoke weed.

    he knows people who have smoked weed.

    but one thing we know for sure: he has never ever ever seen someone smoke weed and die.

    he hasn’t even read about it.

    but yesterday he got on the mic and said that, indeed, marijuana should be considered just as dangerous as LSD and heroin.

    heroin, of course, is a drug where if someone takes too much of it they will die.

    but Drug Enforcement Administration chief Chuck Rosenberg doesn’t want to do the right thing today.

    he doesn’t want to say, weed has never killed anyone. it’s easy to stop doing. and it’s easy to regulate.

    it’s as easy to deal with as booze or cigarettes, and in fact we could make a ton of money off sales tax and other sorts of taxes if we wanted.

    but instead of that we want to lock people in jails, and take their shit, and take their money and ruin their lives.

    Drug Enforcement Administration chief Chuck Rosenberg basically said yesterday that the laws surrounding marijuana are more dangerous than the plant itself

    and thats ok with him

    because he’s a fucking tool

    on the take

    just like his predecessor

    and the one before that one.

    this is the biggest thing im disappointed in obama about.

    because he fucking knows too.

  10. Thursday, July 28, 2016

    why did we let anyone try to convince us that Obama wasn’t great 


    last night the first black president stepped up to the plate
    and did what he normally does
    he looked around, pointed to deep centerfield
    and hit the ball exactly where he pointed
    and ran around the bases casually
    as the whole world cheered.

    yet for nearly eight years we sat there
    and listened to nincompoops and idiots
    bitch and whine that
    Nobama didn’t do this or did that wrong or foolishly.

    people have the shortest memories.

    things were so bad in 2007 that when Obama won his first presidential election
    some speculated that the Republicans didn’t even really try to win
    because they knew that no one could lift us out of the
    shitty stinky fucked up hole
    that eight years of Bush / Cheney sank us into.

    and even though for most of his 8 years he had a do nothing Congress
    who said straight up that they were going to do everything they could
    to make sure he would only be a one-term president
    he ended up being one of the greatest leaders
    an America ever had.
    twenty million people now have health insurance
    millions of gays and lesbians can get married now
    and be in the armed forces without having to pretend
    our national debt has been reduced
    millions of people who were unemployed now have jobs
    the stock and real estate markets are booming.

    and best of all, the Cubs are on their way to becoming a Dynasty.

    if some grumpy old white Republican dude with gray hair and a big belly
    had done this
    they’d be talking about adding him to Mount Rushmore

    never let them convince you
    even for a minute
    that Obama isn’t spectacular.
    they are jealous,
    and they should be
    on so many levels.