nothing in here is true

  1. Thursday, April 10, 2014
  2. Sunday, March 30, 2014

    i want this poster 

    katie and ali

    katie and ali are lovely young ladies and yet this picture both fills me with joy and a tiny bit of dread

    joy because if youve ever hung with either of these women you’d know how fun they are

    and how much love they have for great music.

    dread because the shirt katie is wearing (probably ironically) is from a concert i saw

    (probably before she was born) in Long Beach of Iron Maiden

    that was later released on record (cassette and cd) called “Live After Death”.

    indeed you can hear Bruce Dickinson yell “scream for me Long Beach” (probably ironically)

    during the anthemic “2 Minutes to Midnight”

    why does this give me dread?

    because it makes me feel soooo old.

    and yet lucky, cuz that was a bad ass concert. we were 10th row because my (rich) friend (rob) was obsessed.

    weird fact: Twisted Sister opened and insulted some kids for not standing up for their (lame) set.

    Dee Snyder had the spotlight guy aim the beam at them in the cheap seats

    and try to get the crowd to chant “F You” at the longhaireds

    the crowd also wanted TS to get off the stage so none of us complied

    and the stoners just flipped off the make-up faced singer and they finally stopped.

    and then darkness… and then Eddie appeared on stage.

    and the rest is why pretty girls wear that tshirt a million years later (hopefully)

  3. Thursday, March 27, 2014

    i hope this becomes a thing: giving everything to mick jagger in your will 

    mickI know Mick has lots of money and things.

    But why not give him all the money and things?

    “I give all my jewelry, clothing, household furniture and furnishings, personal automobiles and other tangible articles of personal nature … together with any insurance on the property, to Michael Phillip Jagger,” [L'Wren] Scott’s will stipulated.

    Signed on May 23, 2013, it also pointedly barred her relatives from inheriting a penny.

    “I give the rest and residue of my estate to Michael Phillip Jagger. Except otherwise provided in this will, I have intentionally omitted to provide heirein for any of my heirs at the date of my death.”

    Apparently his amazonian girlfriend who killed herself loved the Rolling Stone so much that she gave him about $9 million in property.

    Weirdly rumor has it she was $8 mill in debt which may have lead to her early and tragic demise.

    Hopefully Mick will give it to charity or something nice.

    Mick Taylor might want the digs, for example.

    Anyways I am slowly changing my mind about having a girlfriend who is taller than me.

    It seems to pay off.

  4. Thursday, March 20, 2014

    if girls stopped kissing djs we’d all get rock n roll back 

    LAX looking good

    first guy i picked up was a bi coastal new york fashion designer, friends with everyone you know, who wanted to go to culver city.

    i have this navigation system in the car that you talk to. it’s taken a while but finally we are beginning to understand each other.

    she knows what im saying but pretends she doesnt. shes slow. she talks to much. shes not intuitive.

    but when you figure out how to say things… and when, and if youre patient, she will nail it and the ride is a completely easy thing.

    but because she’s hard to please, it’s embarrassing to fight with her in front of a customer because you want them to have pure faith in you. for if they do, they can sit back and relax and enjoy the music.

    “ever see that movie Her?” i’ll ask the passenger if the nav does weird things turn 4747 north paul street into 4678 nepal, in nepal.

    if they say they have seen her i say “well this is the opposite of her. in the movie scarlett johanssons voice totally loves the owner of the operating system. this damn car hates me.

    but lately we’re doing ok, so i spoke the address into the system and she got it and we drove towards the beverly center and aimed at the 10.

    frame shop

    dude said hes getting his benz in a few days and we had a nice talk about ny, dogs, professional dog sitters, paris, lindsay, rents, cars, all the things youd talk about with someone who just moved here.

    took the 405 south at 7pm and it was a dream. thats why you have to just try in LA. sure the traffic might be bad

    but youre in LA, youre probably going somewhere cool. do it.

    so many people just stay home and i think thats such a waste. its like in that one Seinfeld where

    someone got a great parking spot and now they dont wanna move the car because its soooo close to their apartment.

    dropped him off, he asked for my card, and i was suddenly near playa vista.

    secret facebook office

    right away i got beeped again and it was for a road she didnt understand, but my uber GPS seemed to think i was close

    parked, waited a few minutes and this young product guy from facebook comes in and asks to go to the airport.

    great conversation where we hit it off immediately because of my real job.

    exchanged some good ideas and soon we were in front of united and shaking each others hands.

    its good to have a good feeling inside you when you drop someone off at LAX,

    because youre probably not going to get another customer for quite a while.

    we are not allowed to take people out of LAX so we have to take this long drive of shame down lincoln

    and hope someone gets you in westchester or PV or the marina because venice seems so far away.

    drove all the way to santa monica and got a couple going to PF changs about 10 blocks away

    then a canadian from alberta who had just been to this really great oyster place

    he lived in the choicest part of marina del rey, right next to the venice border on the beach.

    he talked fast so i wanted the car to take us there and she did.

    dudes got a porsche convertible and basically its cheaper to have uber take him both ways

    than it is to park at valet and tip properly.

    plus he can drink now.



    driving through santa monica and then west la i got this college musician from norway.

    i asked him ok do norweigans think swedish girls are hot or do you guys hate them for some reason?

    he was all, oh no, i personally think theyre the most beautiful in the world. his english was super good, fyi

    barely an accent like these other norweigans i took across town.

    then he told me that norway fought off the russians back in the day and that impressed me.

    should of asked him about how he felt about russian girls but instead we talked about hockey soccer and music.

    he told me hes a singer songwriter and doesnt like hard rock

    (but i think hes talking norweigan black death metal)

    and electric dance music.

    i told him, if girls just stopped kissing djs, the guitar solo would return to earth

    i asked, “any of the kids in your playing guitar solos?”


    then we talked about the flag. i told him when i was in denmark and sweden i enjoyed all the flags flying there

    he told me the norweigan flag is so highly respected it only comes out for national holidays

    and family holidays.

    then you should put it away

    he was very suprised at how good the music scene is here. how so many great bands

    play all the time here.

    we got stuck in terrible one lane traffic on wilshire under the 405

    but who cares im taking tomorrow night off.

  5. Tuesday, March 18, 2014

    the hollywood sign is in hollywood, dont tell anyone 

    debbie harry hollywood signwhen i was little i didnt have any pet peeves because i didnt have the experience then of being around too many annoying people.

    but as time went on i got to either know or hear about people who were crazy selfish or just bizarre.

    one type of person that i am referring to is the type who moves in to a neighborhood that has a super interesting tourist attraction, or a great rock club, or a wild party scene: AND THEN THEY CALL THE COPS WHENEVER ANYONE VISITS

    for example when i lived in Isla Vista, notorious for being the 1 square mile town next to the college known for good parties: there were people who would call the police whenever they heard the slightest “noise”.

    it’s like, Did you not KNOW that young people in Isla Vista like to rage and have bands on their rooftops playing terrible music? How is this news to you?

    likewise the residents in Hollywoodland do their best to keep tourists and tour busses and even semi-locals from driving around their beautiful neighborhood in search of a photo op beneath the Hollywood sign.

    they put up street signs that lie and say “no access to Hollywood sign” and “dead end” and all this nonsense because people want to have what the residents have: a picture near the iconic letters.

    that sign has been there nearly 100 years. i seriously doubt those people have been.

    which is why i love this picture of Blondie’s Deborah Harry in 1979.

    this is what everyone wants in their instagram feed

    and the residents of Hollywoodland don’t.

    i CANNOT wait for judgement day.

  6. Sunday, November 24, 2013

    when the bears lose all i wanna do is play piano and make lists 

    billy corgan at the piano in his house in chicago

    the other day katie made a list of her favorite concerts of her 20s

    and as i was thinking what mine were i realized that so many of my faves were before i was 21

    so heres my top 20 before 21:

    jackson 5, their last tour as kids, circle square theatre

    ac/dc back in black tour, rosemont horizon

    the police synchronicity tour, rosemont horizon

    motley crue, shout at the devil tour, aragon ballroom

    scorpions, love at first sting tour, rosemont

    billy idol, rebel yell tour, poplar creek

    springsteen born in the usa tour (sports arena, la coliseum)

    randy newman / richard thompson, new years eve 1985, wiltern

    fIREHOSE – santa monica college

    beastie boys, licensed to ill, hollywood palladium

    elvis costello – king of america, blood n chocolate 5 night run at the wiltern

    iron maiden live after death tour, long beach arena – SCREAM FOR ME LONG BEACH

    beasties / run dmc, together forever at the greek

    the replacements let it be tour at palladinos

    the replacements tim tour at the roxy

    u2 unforgettable fire tour at the sports arena

    lone justice, bogarts

    the balancing act, the anti club

    peter case and victoria williams, in their back yard

    forget college funds, parents should start rock show funds for their babies.

  7. Saturday, November 9, 2013
  8. Tuesday, August 20, 2013
  9. Thursday, August 8, 2013
  10. Sunday, August 4, 2013