nothing in here is true

  1. Saturday, December 19, 2020

    why you should never give one flying fuck 


    of all the musical geniuses that ever lived, many consider Beethoven to be THE ONE.

    it came easy to Mozart. are you a genius if it was literally a gift from God?

    Hell No.

    you’re a genius if Despite the obstacles in your life or your surroundings you are able to overcome

    and still create miracles.

    above we see an image of Beethoven writing music. things are scratched out, corrections are being made, editing.

    bro’s working. crafting. weeding out the riff raff. changing direction midstream.

    heres Wolfgang Amadeus

    everythings nice, tight, polite. very few notes. maybe a reminder to the conductor or musician, but basically it came from God’s heart and through Mozart’s fingers.

    while I love both of their music, to me, Beethoven should be admired more because he shows that a strong work ethic and intention and commitment can create art that will last forever.

    you might like Mozart more, fine. But most of us agree they were both giants in their field and life is so much better with them than without them.

    enter Leo Tolstoy, a writer who dominated my higher education at the College of Creative Studies at UCSB. our college was supposed to be the cream of the crop. the most talented artists, musicians and writers. and who did the Lit professors fawn over? The Russians. and the top dog, by far was Count Lev Nikolayevich or Лев Николаевич Толстой if you’re nasty.

    we read his short stories his long stories. we read his diaries and his newspaper columns. we read his letters and his poems. you could not get through CCS back when i did without a huge amount of knowledge and respect for the most famous man in Russia during the 19th century.

    one day Tolstoy was chatting it up with the legendary Russian composer Tchaikovsky when Leo dropped a bomb: he didn’t think Ludwig Van was talented.

    Pyotr Ilyich was shocked. And ran home and wrote down exactly how shocked he was and how he was suddenly struggling with how he felt about the writer.

    So you can be the great Ludwig Van Beethoven. Toiling at your keyboard. Going deaf. Are deaf. And some asswipe says you aint got it.

    But worse, this asswipe is the most important mind for generations. Professors across the sea a century after his death are going to be holding up his works as Untouchable Legend.

    he’s the one who says you aint shit. to a peer of yours. to a rival. to a friend.

    so, yes Virginia, someone is going to talk shit about your blog, or your boyfriend or your favorite band or about you.

    let them.

    as elvis costello said, let them talk let them talk let them all talk.

    Jesus was nailed to a cross after he healed the sick and fed the hungry.

    of course people are gonna misunderstand and mistrust you too.

    keep your head down and never stop making that joyful noise.

  2. Thursday, October 8, 2020

    i was in junior high when i heard women and children first 

    some kid brought the record to school.

    there were no turntables in school.

    but he brought it because he had just seen the light. he had heard the incredible sounds and jungle rhythms of Everybody Wants Some and he was going to spread the word to his brothers and sisters.

    and im glad he did because even though i had no money to go to the store and get the record, somehow i heard it too and i too felt the wildness it contained

    who were these golden gods?

    as much as i loved AC/DC, there was a looseness to van halen. it wasn’t so scripted.

    if anything the pattern was: guitar, hook, breakdown, david lee roth saying something sexual, and then a giant climax.

    works for me.

    i saw van halen play exactly three times.

    the first was over the summer in illinois when i was in college. tracey d, who i had dated while being an ice cream man got us tickets.

    that girl was a true leader. no girl had ever bought ME tickets to a concert. but she knew i loved them and she did too. sadly this was the Van Hagar era and even though i didnt really love the new tunes, Sammy was entertaining and afterwards tracey asked me to spend the night with her, something i had never done before so, hubba hubba.

    the second time was with karisa at Staples Center decades later. for some reason we were fighting. was she late? was i late? who knows. but we missed the opener Kool & the Gang. but were in time for the middle opener, Cheap Trick who i had never seen before for some reason. they were fine.

    this was the reunited Van Halen with DLR back. he had a weird little sliding area up front. strange tap shoes kinda. it was like a vaudeville guy fronting a hair metal band. it was awkward. but the music — oh lord the music soothed everything.

    the last time was with jeanine at the Hollywood Bowl. she was sleeping on my couch and was a guitar god herself. we had good seats. the stars were out. and it was a much much better show. soooo long. they played everything they could. wolfie was on bass. it was a perfect night.

    when amber announced that Eddie had died, i rushed to TMZ where she had read it and then to Twitter where I saw Wolfgang’s tweet and I wrote a quickie little obit for Los Angeleno’s FB and Twitter and i realized i needed to call Scott Sterling who never picks up the phone

    but he did with a “this day is like when Prince died.”

    Scott had written a little book about being the only Black kid at the Women and Children First concert in Detroit. so we talked for 20 minutes and i recorded it so i could quote him for the real obit i wanted to write.

    then i emailed Parry Gripp who wrote and performed “Van Halen” for Nerf Herder many moons ago. he wrote back very quickly, and kindly. he too should be in any obit of that great band.

    and then i wrote it as fast as i could because i had something important to do at 3:30pm

    something life changing, potentially, that i hope to reveal later this month.

    finished it at 3pm. and felt good about it. particularly the way Eddie’s Frankenstrat looked on our page.

    the young editor who copyedits me found a generic pic of Eddie with short hair and asked if i wanted to replace the image of the guitar with the pic and i was all, yeah no.

    ah the kids.

    throughout the day i wanted to cry.

    i knew he had cancer. hell, in 2000 before the busblog even existed i made this photo essay about it. (click the pictures)

    over the most recent years i had heard Eddie call in to Howard Stern. the two were friends IRL. i knew he struggled with booze. i knew 65 is way past the expiration date of rock stars.

    but he’s still a guitar hero who was at such a level it almost seemed like a cartoon. otherworldly.

    eddie van halen, like jimi hendrix, was someone you couldn’t even put in a discussion because it ends the debates. it’s not fair. he’s the high score you have to toss out with the lowest score so you could properly find the average.

    he was the opposite of the average.

    and he became that legend on his very first fucking record.

    whose demo was produced by Gene Simmons of KISS because when he first heard Eddie, he too was instantly all in

    just like that nameless kid in my junior high.

    just like me.

  3. Saturday, August 8, 2020

    people say Tom Morello reminds them of me 

    i wish.

    all youve gotta do is listen to this guy for like 5 minutes and you’ll see he’s like no one in the world

    is more to the Left than Bernie.

    his mom is a communist.

    his music in rage is Noise + punk rock + metal in a quasi rap band.

    Bruce Springsteen has 4 guitar players on stage and yet asked Tom to go on tour with him.

    i’d also like to know how many black dudes from Libertyville, IL graduated with honors from Harvard.

    Me? I organize baseball cards on Sundays after watching church on YouTube.

    but would i love to interview Tom Morello one day?

    oh hell yes.

    one thing from this interview id like to ask him about is

    if his mom is half italian and half irish, why did she identify her family as

    A Black family?

    the dad means everything?

    the way the child looks is the determinate feature?

    tomorrow, i believe, i will have a Q&A up on Los Angeleno with an incredible woman and we talk about race for most of it.

    i am cautious about calling people or things racist, but she’s not, and neither is Tom.

    maybe i am being too politically correct?

    or maybe i just have a much higher standard for what i deem to be racism.

    and flat out racist, that, to me, means that they have acted in that manner for more than a short period of time, or in more than just short bursts.

    I went to 80+ SF Giants games when i sold beers there in 1997. before that i went to a few games when i was there in the summer.

    but am I a Giants fan? nope.

    is it wrong to think that way when quickly rushing to judgement about who is a racist and who isn’t?

    Circumstances should be considered. Situations.

    fortunately i have the ability to look into people’s hearts to see what they’re really up to.

    which is maybe why i should return to HR and Recruiting.

    one field i have an incredibly good track record,

    i believe is due to that super power.


  4. Wednesday, August 5, 2020

    and now a word from David Bowie 

    It’s easy to get caught up in the hype. It changes you. So I was on the set of the music video ‘Ashes To Ashes’, do you know the one?

    So we’re on the beach shooting this scene with a giant bulldozer. The camera was on a very long lens.

    In this video I’m dressed from head to toe in a clown suit. Why not?

    I hear playback and the music starts.

    So off I go, I start singing and walking, but as soon as I do this old geezer with an old dog walk right between me and the camera.

    Well, knowing this is gonna take a while I walked past the old guy and sat next to camera in my full costume waiting for him to pass.

    As he is walking by camera the director said, Excuse me mister, do you know who this is? The old guy looks at me from bottom to top and looks back to the director and said…

    ‘Of course I do! It’s some cunt in a clown suit.’

    That was a huge moment for me, It put me back in my place and made me realise, yes, I’m just a cunt in a clown suit. I think about that old guy all the time.

  5. Monday, October 28, 2019

    i wrote a thing about the thing i went to yesterday 

    i love that i can talk to my boss and say omg i just saw a great show should i write about it?

    and she says yes yes

    but because my life is crazy i wasnt able to write it until the dawns early light.

    but i do because i know i was gonna be super busy today

    and when it’s published,  my mom says, omg it was like i was there.

    which is something nice that moms say, but here is the video of the show

    anyways today i got a ticket from a bad cop

    and i told him he was a bad cop

    so he increased the seriousness of the ticket

    which is what a bad cop would do

    and i cannot wait to fight the ticket

    even though people never win these types of fights

    but i want to fight, i dont care.

    im pissed

    you shouldnt ticket people for ticky tack things like “rolling stops” when you’re trying to get your girl to the hospital.

    and you say you believe that. but you give the ticket anyways

    and then the bonus punishment for saying he’s bad.

    but whatever, when i die, people will say, tony kept it real.



  6. Sunday, June 23, 2019

    have i told you ive been watching a lot of youtube 

    it’s true.

    and ive gotta thank the youth of america.

    billy bragg said we should save them and i guess we have, sorta

    of course theyre all gonna melt from global warming

    but before they do i hope they resurrect punk rock, figure out how to refreeze the ice caps

    and get all the plastic outta the oceans

    and when theyre done they will go back to watching youtube

    im very sorry we havent figured out how to stop the clock from ticking.

    seriously. im very sorry.

  7. Thursday, May 9, 2019

    155 well-known musicians 70 or older 


    Tony Bennett – 92
    Harry Belafonte – 92
    Burt Bacharach – 90
    Ennio Morricone – 90
    Loretta Lynn – 87
    John Williams – 87
    Willie Nelson – 86
    Quincy Jones – 86
    Little Richard – 86
    Yoko Ono – 86
    John Mayall – 85
    Richard Chamberlain – 85
    Herb Alpert – 84
    Pat Boone – 84
    Jerry Lee Lewis – 83
    Johnny Mathis – 83
    Sam Moore – 83
    Kris Kristofferson – 82
    Buddy Guy – 82
    Charlie Daniels – 82
    Don Everly – 82
    Frankie Valli – 82
    Wanda Jackson – 81
    Charley Pride – 81
    Kenny Rogers – 80
    Bill Withers – 80
    Gordon Lightfoot – 80
    Smokey Robinson – 79
    Herbie Hancock – 79
    Mavis Staples – 79
    Tina Turner – 79
    Ginger Baker – 79
    Ian Hunter – 79
    Grace Slick – 79
    Spencer Davis – 79
    Giorgio Moroder – 79
    Bob James – 79
    Phil Lesh – 79
    Neil Diamond – 78
    Joan Baez – 78
    Ringo Starr – 78
    Aaron Neville – 78
    Ann-Margret – 78
    Mike Love – 78
    Dionne Warwick – 78
    Tom Jones – 78
    Toni Tennille – 78
    Bob Dylan – 77
    Barbra Streisand – 77
    David Crosby – 77
    Graham Nash – 77
    Charlie Watts – 77
    George Clinton – 77
    Darlene Love – 77
    Paul Simon – 77
    Art Garfunkel – 77
    Wayne Newton – 77
    Carole King – 77
    Dr. John – 77
    Helen Reddy – 77
    Paul Anka – 77
    John McLaughlin – 77
    Eric Burdon – 77
    Mark Lindsay – 77
    Paul McCartney – 76
    Brian Wilson – 76
    Andy Summers – 76
    Sly Stone – 76
    Mike Nesmith – 76
    Jean-Luc Ponty – 76
    Rodriguez – 76
    Taj Mahal – 76
    Mick Jagger – 75
    Keith Richards – 75
    Jimmy Page – 75
    Diana Ross – 75
    Roger Daltrey – 75
    Joni Mitchell – 75
    Randy Newman – 75
    Roger Waters – 75
    David Gilmour – 75
    Steve Miller – 75
    Julio Iglesias – 75
    Albert Lee -75
    Geddy Lee – 75
    Tony Orlando – 75
    Barry Manilow – 75
    Dickey Betts – 75
    Eric Clapton – 74
    Rod Stewart – 74
    Stephen Stills – 74
    Bob Seger – 74
    Jeff Beck – 74
    Billy Cobham – 74
    Robbie Robertson – 74
    Jon Anderson – 74
    Ray Davies – 74
    Boz Scaggs – 74
    Gladys Knight – 74
    Tim Rice – 74
    Robin Trower – 74
    Dolly Parton – 73
    Neil Young – 73
    John Fogerty – 73
    John Paul Jones – 73
    Pete Townshend – 73
    Debbie Harry – 73
    Van Morrison – 73
    Itzhak Perlman – 73
    Steve Martin – 73
    Bette Midler – 73
    Don McLean – 73
    Al Green – 73
    Elton John – 72
    Iggy Pop – 72
    Robert Fripp – 72
    Dennis DeYoung – 72
    Jimmy Buffett – 72
    Linda Ronstadt – 72
    Cher – 72
    Daryl Hall – 72
    Carmine Appice – 72
    Ry Cooder – 72
    Steve Howe – 72
    Howard Shore – 72
    Melanie – 72
    Steven Tyler – 71
    Kenny Loggins – 71
    Jim Messina – 71
    Brian May – 71
    Joe Walsh – 71
    Bob Weir – 71
    Mick Fleetwood – 71
    Ronnie Wood – 71
    James Taylor – 71
    Carlos Santana – 71
    John Oates – 71
    Stephen Sondheim – 71
    Donald Fagan – 71
    Andrew Lloyd Webber – 71
    Ian Anderson – 71
    T Bone Burnett – 71
    Ozzy Osbourne – 70
    Robert Plant – 70
    Stevie Nicks – 70
    Steve Perry – 70
    Grace Jones – 70
    Rick Ocasek – 70
    Billy Joel – 70
    Jackson Browne – 70
    Ted Nugent – 70
    Cat Stevens – 70
    Lulu – 70
    Steve Winwood – 70
    Brian Eno – 70
    Brian Ferry – 70

  8. Monday, March 18, 2019

    the thing about writing is 

    the best times to tell stories and the best time to reveal things and the best times you’re interesting

    are the times you really dont wanna write at all

    and thats when your world is inside out and youre in a free fall

    and you think youre gonna die.

    during those times every part of your brain is firing because its trying to protect you from freaking out

    and every sliver of fear is done stretching and theyre now ready to run.

    problem is, im not fixin to die.

    im tony pierce. busblog. king of siam. leader of the underdogs.

    defender of freedom.

    all of this is happening for all the right reasons and my network of angels are working overtime to get me where i need to be

    just like the done when i wanted to go to the world series.

    did i deserve to go there, and the parade afterwards? no.

    no more so than any one else.

    likewise i dont deserve all these people writing and DMing me and emailing me to provide help. and i feel bad when i dont seem super eager when they offer me this or that.

    unfortunately i want the world.

    unfortunately i know what i want, and i can see the future, and i can read peoples hearts, and when i tell them about every purplish vein in there it can be jarring and uncomfortable.

    which is why even though its so damn cliche i would love to start a podcast and get it going fast. today i was procrastinating reading the bible because i didnt do it on sunday and the whole time i was all i wanna interview him and her and him and her.

    i got to rodney on the roq. and i imagined what id ask him. and i predicted how he would get shy and how i would ask him about his shyness

    and i would ask him do you know that morrissey song ask

    shyness is nice / but shyness can stop you / from doing all the things in life you want to

    i want a podcast so i can ask a music legend if he is familiar with a hit tune from a music legend that he helped get big, and ask him if he feels seen with that song.

    because no one else is dumb enough to ask it.

    and to me, thats wanting the world.

  9. Tuesday, February 26, 2019

    my mom was all, i thought i saw you at the oscars 

    i was like ma thats tom morello from rage against the machine

    who not only looks like a thinner, wealthier, healthier me,

    also happens to be a damn guitar hero.

    as in, he’s one of the guitar heroes you have to face off against in the billion dollar best selling video game guitar hero

    born in harlem, but raised in naperville i think.

    like chicago, his mom is half italian half irish and his dad is from kenya. but the good part of kenya. his great uncle was the country’s first elected president. i guess they had kings before that. who knows. who knows anything?

    tom probably would. he graduated from harvard and then found his way in one of the most powerfully aggressive hyper political heavy rock bands of the 90s. the singer zach de la rocha had this wild afro and stormed around the stage exactly like you would if you were trying to incite a riot.

    riots were incited.

    only one guitarist in this band that sounded like it had 80. and that one was tom. he plays solos like no one else.

    it’s painfully sharp at times.

    it sounds like what electrocution probably feels like.

    the music is meant to get under your skin. the bassist has a stylized filled in giant tattoo of all black.

    also, tom is a cubs fan. also, he played in Bruce Springsteen’s E Street Band for a little while, and on eight tracks of his album “high hopes”.

    when chris cornell left soundgarden for a little while, rick rubin suggested that he hook up with tom and rage because zach had left them to do something far more interesting than be a super star singer of a incredibly important band

    chris and tom and tattoo guy and the drummer (who has been dating juliet lewis for a while) made a band called audioslave which showed us what rage would sound like with an otherworldy singer instead of a dynamic rapper shouter.

    they kicked ass.

    audioslave’s first record went triple platinum, and their follow up went regular platinum. they had a medicore third record, broke up, and tom found himself in a band with the dude from cypress hill and chuck d from public enemy called prophets of rage which was an interesting thing on paper but weirdly… bruce, chris, chuck d, b real, there was something very different about tom and zach

    it was a one two punch in the middle of grunge that took it up a notch. for years if you wanted to put a little spice into a huge festival youd have the red hot chili peppers, but on a night of say 15 bands, if rage was on the bill they better be put on last because how are you gonna follow a hurricane of angst and power and barbed wire solos?

    which brings us to sunday. some devout fans of rage and tom thought that presenting at the oscars is the opposite of punk rock, and to wear a tuxedo is not very rock n roll.

    but anyone who has listened to him in interviews would know, he’s not really here begging for you to love him. he’s just here to save the world.

  10. Sunday, February 10, 2019

    fuck yeah greg mcilvaine 

    last night, in a beautifully appointed rented soundstage in atwater village

    greg vaine, your boy, invited bandmates from groups he’s rocked with since he was a teen,

    to his time in isla vista,


    and now back in LA.

    there were reunions, surprises, cover tunes, a taco hat,

    multiple costume changes,

    it could have gone on all weekend.

    it’s a testament to how loved greg is and how many different genres of music are better when he’s on guitar.

    i hope we do this every 50 years.