nothing in here is true

  1. Wednesday, May 25, 2016
  2. Wednesday, May 18, 2016

    puke and rally 

    puke and rallymegyn kelly was on tv last night

    talking to mr donald j trump,

    (the billionaire)

    and he was fantastic.

    he has learned how to show a tad of humility

    admit theres a scintilla

    of a possibility

    that he could have done things differently

    at one little moment in the past.

    (or at least he’s better at pretending.)

    but the lesson that ive learned from him is the practice of puke and rally.

    no matter what happens

    no matter what he does or says

    if he stumbles, he, like taylor swift

    shakes it off.

    he pukes and then rallies.

    he told megyn that if he did it any other way he probably wouldnt be as successful as he has become.

    as she said, he’s one step away from being president.

    she said it in a weird, fangirl groupie way, and it isn’t true, trump doesnt stand a chance, but i guess in some weird omg annnnything can happen way it’s true.

    like how im only 6 numbers away from being a multi millionaire.

    and just like how every time i lose at the lottery, i just rip up the ticket and go on with my day,

    when trump realizes that he was wrong to say All Mexicans are here to rob and rape and steal

    or how he encouraged people at his rally to be violent to others

    he doesn’t obsess over it, like a human would.

    he gets it out of his system

    and moves on.

    i think theres a life lesson in there for all of us.

    additionally, no one has to hold trumps hair when he pukes.

    so hes got that going for him.

  3. Thursday, March 10, 2016

    i was driving home from work last night minding my own business 

    the poorly educatedlistening to the results of the elections coming in.

    and they cut to Donald Trump making a victory speech because he had just won some big speech.

    and he went on and on and on and there werent any commercials or interruptions

    it was just the GOP frontrunner talking.

    and talking.

    and it dawned on me that CNN, which I was listening to, is in the ratings business. and as long as people were tuned in they were happy.

    and things like debates and chat shows before and after the debates and candidates like Donald Trump are low-budget easy-to-produce television (and radio)

    which, as we are seeing, can bring in much bigger ratings than anything they’ve ever produced before.

    sorry, Anthony Bourdin.

    but then it occurred to me that maybe airing as much Donald Trump as possible for as many ratings as possible might not be the best thing for the country, nor is it the most balanced or responsible journalism. arent there others in this race? shouldnt the public know just as much as the other names on the ballot?

    or is this all about ratings, which means this is all about money, which means once again heres an organization who cares far more about the bottom line than

    silly things like the environment


    alternative energies

    reproductive rights

    and all of the things that donald trump doesnt talk about because those things fly right over the heads of the people who are tuning into him insult the height and energy levels of his opponents?

    in a perfect world all of the politicians would get the same amount of air time. but sadly it seems like many of these cable news operations has no interest in that sort of perfect world.

    it seems their perfect world involves the yuuuugest ratings they could ever get no matter what.

    so i turned off the radio, pulled over, and bought 3 double doubles. because who cares. right?

  4. Friday, March 4, 2016

    Jeopardy accused of being sexist 

    Jeopardy one of my favorite movie bloggers is ms. marya gates who until today was at Rotten Tomatoes but now shes heading over to TCM (congratulations!)

    last year on her tumblr she focused some of her writing about films directed by women. i was definitely enlightened.

    marya must be a big Jeopardy watcher too because today she wrote something fascinating today that only a real fan would have noticed:

    I wrote to you guys about two weeks ago after tracking how often (and by often I mean how NOT OFTEN AT ALL) you mentioned women in your clues. I spent the last few weeks tallying it as well and it has remained horribly grim.

    Tonight (3-4) for example you had BOOK SONGS, and all five songs were written by men. You also had NON FICTION, and all five books were written by men.

    You did have an entire category on Scarlett Johansson Roles, but the last time you did Movie Roles literally the only woman you mentioned was also Scarlett Johansson. Thousands and thousands of actresses in the history of cinema and the only six questions you’ve done in the last three weeks about women movie roles are all about the same actress?!?!?!?!

    I’ve been live-tweeting (@oldfilmsflicker) about this blatant sexism as I watch and I will continue to do so. I hope you improve soon, or this is looking to be a really bleak season for me and for all women and for all men, really. No one is done justice when you ignore the achievements of women.

    Jeopardy, you of all shows should be doing better and the fact that you are not does not give me hope for the rest of our society.

    something tells me something good will come from this

    but i worry because this isn’t the first time the popular game show has been accused of sexism.

  5. Tuesday, February 16, 2016

    you know what i love: The Grammys 

    kendrick at the grammysyou know who almost always gets it wrong: the Grammys

    unlike almost every other tv show the Grammys has a chance every year to present the all time greatest performances of the past with the best of today

    and they hardly ever do it.

    i dont know, but it sure seems like to me they are so concerned about today that yesterday gets shoehorned in like it’s a Have-To instead of a Get-To.

    im sorry but you GET to have the Eagles with Jackson Browne on your stage. You get to have Stevie Wonder, you get to have Joe Perry. And no, you dont Have to have Pitbull or Pentatonix or Carrie Underwood.

    and for the love of Miles Davis, you don’t have to have Justin Bieber or Skrillex


    with Kendrick and Adele and Taylor and Lady Gaga there is already a great parade of current stars delivering today’s sounds, you dont need Demi Lovato, but fine, she’s fine. But should the Grammys be about “fine”?

    If I was running the Grammys i’d have one litmus test for performances: the Holy Fuck test.

    the cast of Hamilton, Kendrick, Gaga and Adele made me say Holy Fuck and there were artists in the building (Beyonce, Ice Cube, Foo Fighters, Stevie Wonder) who could have delivered but either weren’t invited to rock the mic or were paired up with lesser thans.

    the goal of the Grammys shouldnt be about record sales, it should be about documenting amazing artistry in a controlled environment for a tv show. that, all by itself, will trigger sales.

    if you make that the standard, it will lift all boats, including Bieber’s, if you truly belieb he has talent.

  6. Monday, January 4, 2016
  7. my girlfriend kirsten dunst is fantastic in fargo 

    kirstin dunsti cant say i have seen her in very many great things lately. what has she even been in?

    from 2011-2014, heres what shes been up to:

    The Two Faces of January
    Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues
    El Trousias Maiden of the Clouds
    Upside Down
    On the Road
    Random Acts of Violence

    of those I saw Melancholia, which she was fantastic in but man was it weird and she really didnt get to show off a whole range.

    in fargo she got to play lots of different aspects of a woman going through a change in her life.

    in fact she is stretching so much, trying to become “fully realized” someone asks her if shes crazy.


    is she crazy? no. has crazy stuff happened to her? hell yeah.

    kirsten gained about 25 pounds for the role because the character is pretty but not a bombshell. typical hoarder next door who wants to be more of an independent woman while being a good wife.

    i dont know who else they had in mind for this role, but she was perfect. and now my love for her has only intensified.

    very excited that she will star in season three, but what on earth could they have in store for her?

  8. Monday, December 21, 2015

    now is not the time to blame steve harvey 

    colombiaeven though i think Steve Harvey is a bit of a doofus clown, and not exactly my first pick as the host of the miss universe pageant, an event we used to cover here on the busblog extensively, i dont think the mess up was entirely his fault

    after working behind the scenes on a number of projects over the years, the blame has to be placed on the producers.

    the lights, the music, the crowd, the beautiful women, the excitement, vegas, can distract anyone.

    therefore the words need to be written clearly on the card.

    and simply.

    all that should have been on that card was:




    i dont care that this is a last minute tabulation, you have a dozen producers getting paid for this show, you need to treat your talent as talent, their job is to read the words you give them.

    so give them clear clear clear words.

    im sorry this isnt clear


    oh wait, yes it is.

    steve harvey is to blame.

    nobody pay him.

  9. Tuesday, October 20, 2015
  10. Saturday, October 3, 2015

    my man matt welch was on bill maher last night 

    matt welch with bill maher and the black astronomer

    i was doing shots on the roof of a DTLA hotel the other night and i was talking to a beautiful surgeon

    she was actually the girlfriend of the video guy

    and i asked her, have you ever seen anyone make a mistake in the operating room?

    she said sure

    i said what did you say?

    she said, well i know what i Didnt say. i Didn’t say oops.

    she said, that’s the only word you’re not allowed to say in the O.R.

    and then we cheersed to the Video Guy