busblog

nothing in here is true

  1. Tuesday, February 15, 2005

    the white house bent over backwards for nearly two years 

    to get a gay male prostitute a press pass

    but it remains firm in cockblocking him from getting married

    and despite being allegedly pro gay marriage, the instapundit keeps beating the dead horse named eason. the cnn exec who resigned recently after misspeaking at the closed door off-the-record starchamber in switzerland

    instead of patting him down for his laminated credintials, why isnt insty beating his chest proudly that the president is doing exactly what he promised: creating new jobs.

    never before this administration has a gay male prostitute with a fake name writing for a fake news service been allowed such access to the west wing.

    after years of being more conservative than your typical conservative, now it turns out that dubya was more liberal than even the most extreme liberal.

    no wonder he’s so loved all across the country and around the world.

    now i see why he deserved that second term.

    now we know why iraq attacked us on 9/11.

    for our gay bald male hooker press passes.

    some say its almost like the republicans are trying to see how far they can slam the pinball machine before it tilts.

    im going to punk you with a gay male prosititute and see if the red states even blink

    but why would they blink

    it’s not like the president ever says anything worth shit at these press conferences anyway.

    and it’s not like the press actually packs any power anyway.

    and it’s not like half of the right wing press havent been male escorts in one way or another for decades.

    so really, what’s new under the sun, son.

    expose one balllicking right wing lying faker today, another one is bound to pop up the minute the first one goes down.

    and they’re still laughing at you for letting them get away with going to war over wmds

    when there were none.

    + + +

    from Wonkette, 2/14/05

    Free (Hot, Naked) Jeff Gannon
    “Well, we asked for full frontal on fake conservative reporter Jeff Gannon, but we didn’t really think we were going to get it. Seriously, looks like all of Karl Rove’s plans are coming to fruition! Step one: distract the lefties with pictures of cock!

    In any event: Jeff Gannon/JG Duckert is our hero — and he should be a hero to bloggers everywhere. If a loon hooker, working under a pseudonym for a made-up news organization, can spend his days being buddy-buddy with Scott McClellan and George Bush, why, anything can happen for the rest of us!

    So we raise our glasses to Jeff Gannon. We want more ass-fuckers in the White House, not fewer! Also? Anyone who apparently commands $1200 for a weekend of outcalls demands our respect.”

    + + + +

    from Ken Layne 2/14/05

    The only mystery regarding the “Jeff Gannon” scheme is this: Why was it so easy to find out he was a fraud, and a sex-hustler, too? What is the value in getting caught running this homosexual whore who markets himself as a U.S. Marine? Obviously, this kind of character doesn’t meet the “family values” of our leaders. If you even admit to being homosexual in this nation’s military, you’re dismissed. And while the anti-gay-marriage Constitutional Amendment pushed by the Bush Administration didn’t specifically address renting a homosexual Marine for a night of anal sex and erotic wrestling, you can make certain assumptions.

    The White House will pay no penalty for this, obviously. They can do whatever they want. If Bush appeared at a Social Security press conference dressed as the Indian Chief from the Village People and repeatedly referred to himself as “Americuh’s Number One bitch,” there would be no penalty. But if anybody on the wrong side had relations with “Jeff Gannon,” they would be finished. This must be the angle. The White House can buy whatever “real” journalist or columnist or anchor they want. “Jeff Gannon” had to either have a Special Purpose or such a Special Duty that he was rewarded with this phony White House Correspondent position. What our National Leaders teach us again and again is that there’s no limit to their personal depravity.

    americablog + is everyone in the white house gay? + todays salon gannon story

  2. Saturday, June 5, 2004

    why the president is a fucking retard 

    george w by tony pierce, 110

    if you ever go to the special olympics you will see a spirit that is absent from any other sporting activity you’ll ever witness: unconditional love and reward.

    even the slowest, most fumbiling child who finishes a race gets a hug. a loving embrace for participating in the event. a symbol and an action that says, you tried and thats all that matters.

    you are loved.

    the only institution that mimics this behavoir is the united states of america and it’s relationship to the president of the united states, george bush, and the people and things that he supports.

    they treat him like the retard that they know he is

    the tard inside of us all.

    and regardless of what his results are, the attitude that they take is

    you know hes a fucking idjit, give him a break already

    while looking at you like youre the asshole.

    if you say the economy is fucked the gas prices are ridiculous and the job market is in the pits, they will say ah but theres a recovery cant you see it?

    even though bush is on track to be the first president since the great depression to have a net loss of jobs over his term.

    if you say the war on iraq was unneccessary, too expensive, a failure, and a shortcut toward a new vietnam, they will say but the world is a better place without saddam.

    if you say great, well we got saddam, so lets leave, they will say cant leave bro, too much unrest. we have to stay in there till everythings chill again. democratic elections and stuff.

    and then if you ask, well what if these people elect another saddam? they will say, oh they wont. dont worry. they wont.

    and they smile.

    and theyre so certain.

    just as certain as they were that we would find weapons of mass destruction in iraq.

    and democrats love it when republicans are certain.

    and the republicans said that it was a slam dunk that we would find wmd in iraq and so the democrats believed them. after all, who knows more about weapons of mass destruction more than republicans. shit, they probably sold them to saddam on the low down.

    a month ago.

    and they will say, dude we found a weapon of mass destruction last month. fucking bomb full of sarin! beeyootch!

    sarin, of course being the man-made nerve agent first manufactured by the Nazis in 1938 and is part of the organophosphorus family of chemicals commonly used as pesticides.

    sarin of course being the gas that was used in the terrorism in 1995 in the japanse subway system.

    sarin of course being the agent that was instantly reduced from mythical heights to ho-hum lows after that very terrorism in 1995 because it proved that even in the highly dense enclosed envoirnment of the toyko subway system during rush hour, 6 liters of sarin will “injur” 6,000 victims but only kill 6, and thus a highly ineffective weapon of mass destruction.

    sarin of course being a subsequent worthless “weapon” when used in the open battlefield or worse, the desert of central iraq, particularilly when only traces are found in a 155mm shell.

    the 155mm shell with trace of sarin is the weapon of mass destruction that many conservatives point to as being the ah-ha smoking gun proof that iraq really did have wmd’s even though Army Brig. Gen. Mark Kimmitt admitted upon inspecting that “It’s virtually ineffective as a chemical weapon,”

    the 155mm shell with the small amount of sarin gas, of course being the retard hug at the end of the long race that bush’s supporters give him before he sucks through the straw on his juice box.

    and anna kournikova who was over tonight said you know its really not cool to compare retarded people to the president.

    and i said why.

    and she said cuz its unfair to retards.

    and this time, damnit, shes right.

    welch + gorilla mask + buzznet